Today has been a bit of an odd day really. I’m on day 9 of not smoking, and I am so pleased that I have managed to make it this far without caving in to temptation….

Today I was working in a different bay to where I normally work, (but a change is a good as a rest), so after greeting everyone with a cheery ‘Good morning,’ it was time to make sure everyone had eaten their breakfast and see if they needed anything before I started on the drugs round. The care worker,  who was working with me , asked if I could help her to get one of the ladies onto a commode, as she was a little tricky to transfer with just one person.

Of course, I put on my pinny and gloves and we both helped to get the patient on the toilet…As I turned around, I noticed a few small, brown deposits on the floor, oh dear, my poor lady had a bit of an accident. I warned my co-worker to be careful, of the mess on the floor, but it was already too late; one of the deposits was a bit smudged and flattened, and as realisation dawned on my co-worker, she held up her foot for inspection, and sure enough she had trodden in it.. and due to having rather deep treads on the underside of her shoes, it had become ingrained deep in the crevices, as well as the couple of blobs that were on the side!

I stifled my laughter as I went to quickly retrieve some clinical wipes to clean up the mess. My co-worker’s face was so comical as she stood balanced on one leg as  I scrubbed at her shoe. Still if this was going to be how the day started, it did not bode well…

However we managed to get through the morning with no further  incidents, but I was feeling a bit twitchy. I had been out to break with the smokers earlier, and we went to the usual bench, which today, was unoccupied, due to it having rained earlier in the morning. However, we had come prepared, and laid out our incontinence pads over the wet seat to keep ourselves dry.I watched enviously today as they fitted in as many cigarettes as they could ,as well as their food, as I really wanted to join them in a cigarette. (I can’t get my head around the fact that I am a NON-SMOKER now).

I resisted the urge of course, and stomped back to work feeling a little disgruntled. After a while I was told that they were giving out flu jabs outside the ward, and as I have had 2 lots of lurgy recently I decided that it might be a good idea for me to get the jab, I joined the end of a massive queue, and whilst waiting I tried to remember which arm I had put my nicotine patch on so that I could get the jab in the other one.I couldn’t find it….I got the jab anyway and went back to the ward.

I saw our ward clerk and I asked her if she could see it on my arm. She couldn’t either so in the end I had the zip on my dress half undone, with her patting me down looking for this bloody patch…No, it was not there! That was why I was really craving a cigarette today, I wasn’t usually this bad. Once I had got over the initial panic of not having my patch on where I roared out to anyone who would listen “I have lost my patch, and I have not smoked for NINE days”. I couldn’t bear the fact that I still had a few hours left before I could get home to replace it, and I did not want to blow all my hard work,

I saw the boss out the corner of my eye and decided that perhaps I had better calm down and sort myself out. I slunk into one of the offices where we write out notes, and set about filling out a long and complicated  form that was needed for one of my patients. By the time I had finished that, the craving was gone and normality resumed for the rest of the shift. It’s a shame that being smoke-free is not stress-free!!