Rhyme and No Reason!

Blogger, author and rhymester who likes to find the humour in life.

Never ‘Just A Mum’ — March 6, 2016

Never ‘Just A Mum’

Mum 5
My Mum!

 

I wrote this poem last year, but thought it would be perfect for  Mother’s day and good to re-share it for those that haven’t seen it before.

Oh, and of course, you can also find this poem in my new book ‘Rhymes of the Times. which is now available on Amazon and Kindle!

Happy Mother’s Day for all those that are celebrating it today 🙂

 

You wake up constantly through the night

To each and every cry

You soothe, you feed, you  keep them clean

Then croon a lullaby

You take their hand as they take a step

Your face is filled with joy

You sing, you dance, you muck about

With your precious girls and boys

You nurse them when they are poorly

You kiss them when they weep

You fret, you stress, and you can’t relax

Until they are fast asleep

They sometimes drive you crazy

So you say you’ll smack their bum

You cook, you clean, you’re everything

But you’re never ‘Just a Mum’!

Episode 160: Real Men Do Cry! — February 13, 2015

Episode 160: Real Men Do Cry!

For those of us that have men in our lives, we accept that they may not be perfect but according to the Bookmakers William Hill there are fifty skills that your man should have in order to qualify as a ‘real man.’ Apparently they questioned 2000 people in order to discover what qualities it takes to accomplish this,

The list includes things like being able to tie a tie, knowing how to wire a plug, being able to change a light bulb, as well as know when your anniversary is, and how to do the laundry.

I have decided to make my own little list of what qualities I think ‘real men’ should have, which are in no particular order:

Not being ashamed to cry. I don’t mean just when their team loses an important match, I mean actually showing a bit of emotion when something has affected them deeply. Having said that,I don’t want him bawling his head off at the slightest thing!

  • Enjoy shopping. A real man will not be at all fazed whilst accompanying you on a shopping trip, and that includes browsing at lingerie! It is so annoying when you go to ask your parter’s opinion on a racy little number, only to find that he has legged it!
  • Be a good cook. Although I do like to cook at times, it is great that Mr Grump loves cooking and is so good at it too!
  • Have a decent sense of humour. Because I like to laugh at things, and enjoy making fun of silly situations, it is important to me to have someone to laugh with. I don’t want to be with someone who is precious about me taking the mickey out of them!
  • Not having an aversion to housework. Being able to push a vacuum around is a huge plus in my book. It is one of those jobs that I hate doing! For some reason, I have never known a man who is good at dusting and polishing, but if he is handy with a vacuum then that’ll do!
  • Enjoy driving.  Although I drive myself, I am not that keen on it, so a man must be able to drive, and drive well! It is pretty off-putting if a man is crunching the gears or taking about 20 attempts to parallel park, when he is behind the wheel.
  • Be well-groomed. Now a real man knows how to be well-presented. I like him to be smartly dressed in ironed clothes,smelling nice and have clean nails! I don’t however, want him to take longer getting ready than I do, hog the mirror, nick my beauty products, or borrow my straighteners (if he has hair of course).
  • Be good at DIY.  I like a man who is handy to have around. You never know when you need a shelf putting up,a room to be decorated or someone to fix something that I have broken.This is a very important quality in my book.
  • Know when to make himself scarce! This one is pretty important as well. I don’t just mean when you are having a ‘girly’ night in and don’t want the old man around. I mean that he knows to get out of your way when you are in a mood (especially if he is the one that has wound you up)!

Are there any that I have missed out, what qualities do you think a real man has?

Episode 118: Goggle-Eyed Watching The Goggle Box! — January 22, 2015

Episode 118: Goggle-Eyed Watching The Goggle Box!

Isn’t it strange how much TV can influence our lives? It can educate, shock, entertain; bring us to tears even; and you could get all of that in just one episode of your favourite soap!

Now, I don’t actually watch any soaps anymore, but recently, an actress that had been on a very long-running British soap had died at the age of 60. Anne Kirkbride or Deirdre Barlow as she was known to many, burst onto our screens 44 years ago as a fresh-faced 17 year old. She had the nation gripped with her numerous marriages, and relationships, before finally ending up with dear old Ken (again). Even our Prime Minister became involved when one storyline sent her off to the clink for a bit! And he demanded that she be freed!

It was the same with Dallas. I can sill remember the ‘who shot JR?’ saga. People even had t-shirts emblazoned with ‘I shot JR.’   Staying with Dallas, what about the uproar when Bobby died, and then came back a few years later, clean and sparkly from a nice shower! (He didn’t even have that wrinkled skin you get after a while, let alone a few years)!

Many people have grown up with some of these characters, and they almost feel like they are part of the family.We laugh with them, cry with them, and can’t wait to tune in to the next episode to see what they will get up to.

As for the Christmas episodes, well, you can’t wait! You know there’s going to be a MEGA disaster of EPIC proportions! What will it be?? Will it be a tragic accident that wipes out half of the cast? Will it be a shocking revelation? Or will there be an almighty punch-up? Whatever it is , you can guarantee there will be legions of fans, glued to their TVs in order to find out!

How many of us have also been guilty of using TV to ‘babysit’ our kids? I have to own up to this one. When my daughter was very young, I have plonked her down in front of the TV, watching one of the kids’ channels whilst I have got on with a bit of housework or something! She has never had a long attention span, so I used to make the most of however long I got!

Reality TV has really taken off now too. Oh how we love to see poor unfortunate people (mainly celebrities) making utter fools of themselves, either being locked up in a house with a load of other people who they have nothing in common with, for a few weeks, or being sent to a jungle , again with others who they don’t know and have very little in common with! Deprive them of a few home comforts, make them compete with each other for ‘treats’ , then sit back and watch it all kick off!

I am rather partial to the crime channels. I don’t know why, but they fascinate me. It is amazing how they uncover the whole story from start to finish of a crime that has been committed, sometimes with just the smallest amount of evidence. I am surprised though at the amount of spouses that get ‘bumped off’ for the insurance money, and the sly and devious methods used to try to fool everyone that the death is genuine! Hmmmm, STILL haven’t got Mr Grump insured…..

Happy viewing, I’m off to sort out some paperwork!

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