Rhyme and No Reason!

Blogger, author and rhymester who likes to find the humour in life.

Happiness is…… — March 3, 2016
How I Hate Doing Housework! — February 25, 2016



For Sacha’s Writespiration this week, I was trying to think about when I was ‘on the edge’ as that is her prompt, then I remembered something very special, an event that happened when I was about seventeen.

After you have read it for the first time, you might want to go back and sing it, as it might make more sense! (I don’t want to give it away right now)!

It’s close to midnight

And something special’s just about to start

I’m so excited

I can feel the rapid pounding of my heart

I’ve stayed up late

Just so I can watch this special moment

Never before

Had something like this happened on tv

Only in movies!

Yes it was Thriller, Thriller night

And I was sitting there, right on the edge of my seat

You know, killer, Thriller night

The moment had arrived and it was

Perfect, amazing, that niiiiiight

Zombies and undead,

creeping from their graves in the dead of night

Michael and Ola,

Walking home under the full moonlight

He starts to change

But first of all, she doesn’t seem to notice

Then he looks strange

As she looks at him

Right between the eyes

He’d been Zombified!

Yes, it was Thriller, Thriller night…..

Episode 147: On Your Bike! — February 6, 2015

Episode 147: On Your Bike!

I admire cyclists; anybody that can manage to keep themselves upright for an unlimited amount of time, whilst balancing on two (very skinny) wheels has my respect. I can actually ride one myself, but when I (rarely) venture out on my bike, I end up pushing it more than riding it, as I am a bit wobbly! Mr Grump and Miss Hap usually end up whizzing past me, leaving me behind.

Anyway, there is one particular cyclist in Britain at the moment, that has made a bit of a name (not to mention reputation) for himself. He is a bus driver for a living, but commutes to work (40 mile round trip) on his bike. The reason he is so different from the norm? He loves to report other road users to the Police if they misbehave.

This guy takes his self-imposed role very seriously indeed, and has kitted himself out with no less than 3 video cameras (wonder where he puts them all)? and a really LOUD horn (I would imagine that in itself could cause an accident if he sets it off,  making people jump and losing concentration).

He films wrong-doers abusing the Highway Code, and dobs them in to the Police. There are no second chances. If you are in the wrong lane and then cut someone up, (especially him), your card is marked; if you go the wrong way around a roundabout (God knows why you would want to), you will be reported. Oh yes, this bloke is on a mission. He will also very kindly plaster his footage all over YouTube so that your antics can be judged by other outraged road users.

He is proud of the fact that he has managed to help convict over 70 careless motorists, but like with everything there is a small price to pay, he is now dubbed ‘Britain’s Most Hated Cyclist. If that wasn’t bad enough, he is so well-known that drivers that come across him, will throw a few punches his way regardless of whether or not they have been captured on his camera for some misdemeanor,

He is not bothered though and is more determined than ever to tackle Britain’s rubbish road users and bring them to justice!

I’m bloody glad he doesn’t live near me!

Episode 120: More To Me Than Meets The Eye — January 24, 2015

Episode 120: More To Me Than Meets The Eye

I have come to the conclusion that I am quite a contradictory person. My actions are quite often out of sync with my personality. I will think one thing and then do another….

For instance, for someone who is still quite shy, and awkward when meeting people, you would think that the last thing I would want to do is blogging! I mean, by its very nature, it is putting my thoughts and opinions out there for all and sundry to read, and comment on. By the same token, I also comment on other people’s blogs.

This means that I have to interact with people who I do not know, in fact have never even met! I could well be opening myself up to a great deal of criticism if someone objects to, or misunderstands one of my posts,

I have even put videos on my blog of myself reading my poems as I wanted to ensure they were conveyed in the way that I intended them to be. What kind of dunce does that when they are very conscious of how they look? Not only that, I haven’t even used my name but have plastered my image all over the place….

Another irony is that I suffer from depression, but like to try to write humorous posts! What is that all about?! I know that laughing is good for the soul, so I like to try to see the funny side of things. One of my great pleasures in life is to make others happy. If I can do that by making them laugh then so much the better, However, it can be one hell of a struggle coming up with funny posts when that is the last thing that I am feeling (especially recently)!

I am a huge fan of music, and yet I can neither sing nor dance! Many is the time that I have gone to my sister’s house for a [arty and they have ended up getting out the karaoke machine.Now her and her husband used to do this as a business, and they both can sing very well (my brother-in-law is also a musician).

It doesn’t stop me from snatching the mike and screeching my head off to one of my favourite numbers, and this is sober as I don’t drink!  I can see my brother-in-law frantically twiddling knobs trying to drown me out or make me sound better, or something!

Dancing is a bit more of a problem! Despite my two left feet, I will strut around my front room when the mood takes me, but I still hate dancing if I am out anywhere. What I hate even more is if someone attempts to dance with me. A family friend once grabbed hold of me and started trying to twirl me around, but I immediately went stiff, and then trod all over him! He complained to my mum about my lack of rhythm!

My personal space is a standing joke with one of my good friends that I used to work with. I have about a 2 feet no go zone, I really am not keen on people getting too close at all. Anyway, we used to have this colleague that could not have a conversation unless she was almost on top of you. This really used to freak me out, and I would try to avoid talking to her if at all possible!

It didn’t stop her talking to me though and, as she kept closing in on me ,I would be backing away further and further until I was literally backed against the wall, and no option but to talk to the face that was about an inch from my own!

Why then choose a job now where I physically have to touch people?! It doesn’t make sense, but I love my job, and I will very often give my patients a hug, I am forever holding their hands when I talk to them, or stroking their faces when they are very poorly, but for some reason this does not bother me at all!

I suppose that I am someone who has ‘hidden depths’ and not just bloody odd!

Video Poems — January 18, 2015

Video Poems

Just a quick post to let you know that I have added a new feature to my blog. It has been suggested to me (plus I had already considered) reading out some of my poems.

I have finally managed to do it! I have added a new page to my blog where you can find them (actually there is only one on there at the moment..just wanted to see the reaction I get)! 🙂

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