What a lovely start to my day… my right arm being tortuously mangled under a rapidly inflating blood pressure cuff at 6 o’clock in the morning, AND on a day off! No ,I haven’t got an early doctor’s appointment (This is England after all), I am sporting the natty combo of large blue cuff, plus cheeky little pack that accompanies it,which can be worn around the waist (I haven’t got one), or over the shoulder, which I opted for. This was fitted yesterday  in order to monitor my blood pressure for 24 hours.

It’s a good job I am not some trendy fashionista , as my blood pressure would surely have shot through the roof if I were the type to be embarrassed walking about with my little ensemble, along with the long, ugly grey tube dangling by my side, artfully taped onto my shoulder to avoid ‘kinking’.

Thank God the damn thing would soon be off, and I will not have to suddenly stand stock still sticking my arm out every half hour when the readings are taken.Not ideal when I have just picked up a load of washing from upstairs to put in the machine, and it getting entangled in my paraphernalia, only to have  to suddenly force my arm downwards whilst the reading takes place, trying to keep hold of everything.

My husband ( Mr Grump) decides to surface, to take the dog out before he goes off to work, His bloodshot eyes give me a clue that perhaps he did not have a great night’s sleep himself ,and he confirms this by moaning about my machine beeping during the night, plus the steady humming noise it made as the cuff inflated every hour; this harmonised nicely with my hacking and spluttering cough, and the ‘clomp clomp’ of me stomping downstairs to let him rest, and then, not being able to settle, clomp clomping back to bed again, which was performed in a continuous  loop all night!

My eleven year old daughter (Miss Hap) joins the party, still in her pyjamas, not concerning herself with getting dressed and ready for her new secondary school, for which she has less than half an hour before she leaves. I try to encourage her to get ready but am greeted with a baleful stare and “I’m tired”. Looks like this day is improving by the minute! Finally she is ready, and after going through the check-list of books, bus pass etc. she flounces off with her friend to catch the bus.

With Mr Grump dispatched off to work soon after,I am looking forward to relishing a bit of peace and quiet and decide to get myself ready for the day ahead. This is no mean feat, trying to negotiate getting my clothes on without strangling myself with the ugly,dangling tube, despite having briefly disconnected it from the machine.

Time for a quick visit to my mother’s before heading off to the surgery to have my new appendage removed. My younger sister is also at my mother’s house looking lovely in her summery clothes, singing as she mops the kitchen floor. Both her and Mum try not to snigger as I lumber in with my new accessory, and tactfully avoid mentioning it.

Thinking I would feel better after a nice cup of tea, I was sorely disappointed to be told I would have to wait for the floor to dry. As per usual, my timing was impeccable. I had forsaken my cuppa at home in order to make some more time to spend with my mum, and my throat was dry, especially as I had this awful cough, which made it sore.

Eventually after being suitably refreshed, and disencumbered of my burden by the kindly nurse, I ventured back home to feel sorry for myself, as by now, I had the muzzy head and tickly throat which usually signals the start of a cold. This coupled with my lack of sleep compounded my misery and self-pity.

Not to worry though because my sister decided to come round from Mum’s, with her rather large and boisterous Labrador in tow! After a very pleasant afternoon chatting and listening to 80’s music she decided to go home…not before her dog was sick in my garden though!!!!