Rhyme and No Reason!

Blogger, author and rhymester who likes to find the humour in life.

#Sillysaturday Health Petra the Pear — September 1, 2018

#Sillysaturday Health Petra the Pear

pear with rotten teeth!
Image courtesy of Sandra Dorey

I have teamed up again with the talented Sandra (or Daffy as I like to call her), from Wild Daffodil to bring you another bit of silliness this Saturday.  Sandra is incredibly artistic and creative, and I just love the images she has created out of shells, stones and flowers.

One of the nicest things about Sandra’s blog is that you never know what she is going to get up to next, from beach art to knitted wigs, and mandalas to making spirals in her garden.

This week’s Silly Saturday is all about a poorly pear named Petra. After several comments about Tom the tomato possibly being a good example to use to encourage people to look after their teeth, we thought it would be fun to introduce a couple of #SillySaturday Health posts. Although there is still the usual silliness you can expect from us both, there is also a serious side too. Anyway, please let us know what you think of this idea.

Petra the pear was feeling poorly  

She didn’t know quite what to do

Not only was she putting some weight on

But she was suffering from toothache too!

She had started to let her self go a bit

Indulging in too many treats

The sugary snacks made her teeth hurt

Causing trouble whenever she eats!

For too many years she’d been smoking

Which caused her teeth to go brown

Her gums receding and bleeding

It was time to turn things around.

She wanted her life to be fruitful

And continue her family tree

But she had to make sure she was healthy

And in the best shape she could be

First stop was to the doctors

To get help with giving up smoking

The harm it was causing her body

Was both sobering and thought-provoking

As if heart disease and strokes weren’t enough

It could cause breathing problems as well

Tooth loss, fertility problems and cancer

Not to mention the horrible smell

She decided to go for the patches

And started the very next day

She found that her nicotine cravings

Were slowly melting away.

Next stop was to the dentists

To see if something could brighten her smile

Because her teeth were so neglected

It was going to take a little while

It was not just about brushing and flossing

That Petra had neglected to do

But her sugary addiction

Had helped in her tooth decay too

Th dentist took some impressions

And gave Petra’s mouth a good clean

She was advised not just to clean the outside

But all around, underneath and between.

It was too late for poor Petra

To save some of the teeth that she had

She had to make some appointments

To remove the ones that were bad

Several months later and Petra is glowing

Her smile now so fresh and so bright

She cleans her teeth like an expert

Even the ones she takes out at night!

Images Courtesy of Sandra Dorey

Episode 43: Swallowing My Pride…… — November 13, 2014

Episode 43: Swallowing My Pride……

As sore throats go, the one that I have got is not only stubborn, but bloody painful! I went to the doctors with it just over a week ago, was packed off with antibiotics, told I was infectious, and that I should try to rest …..

Knowing what is good for me, I took his advice,plus the tablets, and did not go out the house all week! That was until yesterday when the tablets had finished, but my throat was still so sore, every time I swallowed it felt like broken glass was cutting as it went down (not that I have ever tried swallowing glass of course)! I got another appointment at the doctors.

The weather looked cold and overcast, so I put on my long, black ‘Goth’ coat that I love, phoned for a taxi (My bloody car is STILL off the road) and off I went. I duly got examined again, throat swab was taken (I retched and gagged whilst she did this, not very becoming I know).and different antibiotics prescribed! I am not a fan of taking tablets at the best of times, and the first lot I given were HUGE! I mean, how the hell do you expect someone to take a bloody great horse tablet with a sore throat who can barely swallow?!

Anyway.I . said I would take the tablets, and then made some feeble joke about how I have never been ill as much as I have been since giving up smoking (well actually it is true). That comment was met with an icy look, and a stern warning not to start-up again! Suitably put in my place, I left the surgery, and for some reason, decided to walk to my visit my sister who lives about a 15 minute walk away.

As I started walking, I phoned her to make sure she was back from work and told her i was on my way. By now I had made it out onto the busy main road which leads from the town centre to the area where we live. It would have been quite nice to have been out in the fresh air after a week cooped up, but the heavens opened an a downpour started. Oh great….My coat had no hood and I had  no umbrella!  I kept on walking not having any choice,  but I had that uncomfortable sensation of my tights starting to roll down!

I walked a little bit further, but I could feel the ‘ping’ as they had made it over the mound of my stomach, and I knew that their journey downwards was going to be unhampered now, and I needed to do something about it QUICK. I tried to surreptitiously hike them up one side at a time, but couldn’t get a decent grip on them. Now they had made it down halfway over my bottom, so I had to try something else. I sped up, walking as fast as I could, trying to get under my coat and skirt to get at these runaway tights, but not was not very successful.

I carried on this bizarre little dance all the way to my sister’s house, which at last I had arrived at! I barged in, yanked up my annoying tights and said hello!  My sister had thoughtfully made me a huge cup of tea and a delectable sandwich which I was grateful for. We exchanged pleasantries, and I told her that my throat was still sore. I noticed she had already kept her distance from me, plus she told me in no uncertain terms that she didn’t want it! … I decided I’d better not hang around too long, thereby exposing her to my germs, so I went to leave, thanking her for the lunch.

As I was going out the door….I glanced back to say goodbye again, and noticed that she had got the bleach out to disinfect the cup I had been using….Charming! Nothing like feeling wanted!

Episode 9: Bittersweet — September 29, 2014

Episode 9: Bittersweet

Monday morning,the start of the working week, uniform ironed, lunch made, car fuelled up….everything is ready. Only problem is, the bloody lurgy has come back AGAIN!! I can’t believe it, I have only just shaken off a sore throat and fever (see previous posts), and now it has come back with a vengeance in less that a WEEK!! This time as well as previous symptoms, I now have the full-blown sneezy, snotty, not to mention snorty, cold that goes with it!! This time, I decided I will go and see the doctor…..

I go to wake Mr Grump up,for him to get ready for work, and as he got out of bed, he startled me by emitting a mighty yelp! It turns out that his shoulder was hurting (He injured it at work about 3 months ago when he slipped on some wet steps whilst lugging some goods he was delivering, and he fell all the way to the bottom) and every now and again it plays him up.However, off he went in his little delivery van to start his rounds.

Miss Hap trudged off to school, laden with so many bags (PE kit, cookery ingredients, plus usual books etc) that I could barely see her beneath them all. God knows, whether I am going to get my ‘fruit fusion’ as promised, or whether it will end up being a smoothie due to the fruit getting mangled on the journey to school!

Anyway, with those two out of the way, I settled down on the sofa to languish in my self-pity, and watched awful daytime tv, punctuated with regular loud sneezes exploding from my poor nose, making my head hurt. …

After about an hour I got a call from Mr Grump. He was at his first delivery, and just as he was finishing bringing in his last load, his shoulder gave out completely, so he was waiting for the boss to pick him up to bring him home, and he would need to see the doctor…could I make him an appointment?!

I said I would, but didn’t hold out much hope that he would get one,as  I had  spent 15 mins trying to get through on constant redial, and then could not get one until after 4pm. Needless to say, once I told the receptionist what had happened to him he got one for 12.30!

Another half an hour goes by, and then I get another call from Mr Grump. His boss had dropped him off a few of miles away as he had a meeting to go to, and could I pick him up?!! NO, I bloody couldn’t! I’m supposed to be wallowing in my illness here, I didn’t want him home moaning and groaning about his shoulder all day, and demanding attention! Still, guilt got the better of me and I dragged myself out to get him! My guilt was compounded when the doctor signed him off for two weeks with a suspected torn muscle (OUCH)! Still, at least the dog was pleased to see him!

My turn came to see the doctor,and as suspected, it was a virus, inflamed throat, hacking cough, fever etc,  but I would just have to put up with it; however the results were back from the blood test I had done last week, and although most of them were fine, the fasting blood sugar was too high, and that coupled with other symptoms I had been experiencing, meant that I now had Type 2 Diabetes. Shit! I didn’t see that coming…..

My mind was reeling as she printed off some information sheets, and informed me that for the first three months I would have to go on a strict diet to try to control the blood sugars, Oh My God, this is going to mean a lot of changes,I had already cut out what little sugar I ate anyway, but now would have to be extra vigilant for the hidden sugars that are in so many foods. Plus of course I would need to eat a healthier diet. She then told me nonchalantly that she would register me as a diabetic, and ushered me out of the door!

Stunned, Mr Grump and I went to pick up his prescriptions that he had got earlier, from the pharmacy, and he asked me what cough mixture I wanted to try to assuage this awful bark that I have. “For Christ’s sake make sure it’s the sugar-free variety!” I answered…I think there may be some challenges ahead!

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