Rhyme and No Reason!

Blogger, author and rhymester who likes to find the humour in life.

#Sillysaturday Randy Reindeer — December 8, 2018

#Sillysaturday Randy Reindeer

I have teamed up again with the talented Sandra (or Daffy as I like to call her), from Wild Daffodil to bring you another bit of silliness this Saturday.  Sandra is incredibly artistic and creative, and I just love the images she has created out of shells, stones and flowers.

One of the nicest things about Sandra’s blog is that you never know what she is going to get up to next, from beach art to knitted wigs, and mandalas to making spirals in her garden.

We haven’t done a Silly Saturday for a while, but I couldn’t resist joining in when Daffy showed me this brilliant photo….

Randy was now in disgrace

At Christmas he got ‘off his face’

Whilst pulling Santa’s sleigh

He went the wrong way

He was lurching all over the place

He’d been partaking of too many beers

Which isn’t good for reindeers

Turning up for work plastered

Could only lead to disaster

As it affected the way that he steers

He is hoping to go back to work

He promised that he will no longer shirk

With his lopsided antler

He can expect plenty of banter

As he looks a bit of a berk!

Image courtesy of Sandra Dorey
November 16th Flash Fiction Challenge – Mesh — November 17, 2017

November 16th Flash Fiction Challenge – Mesh

It is time for another foray into the world of Flash Fiction. This week, Charli from the Carrot Ranch has given us this image and mesh to use and here are the rules:

mesh

November 16, 2017 prompt: In 99 words (no more, no less) use the word mesh in a story. Mesh is both an object and a verb, which you can freely explore. You can play with its sound, too. Go where the prompt leads.

Respond by November 21, 2017 to be included in the compilation (published November 22). Rules are here. All writers are welcome!

 

The metallic clanking appeared to be coming from the kitchen. “PETE, what are you doing?”

Silence, then more clanking with additional thudding.  Irritated, Sarah got out of bed, went to the bathroom then headed downstairs for some water to moisten her dry mouth.

“I’LL ALWAYS LOVE YOOOOOOO.” Dear God, not the singing!  Opening the kitchen door Sarah’s stomach growled at the aroma of frying bacon, her eyes then drawn to the discarded egg shells, and crumbs from a semi hacked loaf.

“Fanshy a shnack?” Sensing disapproval Pete apologised. “Shorry, I sheem to have made a bit of a mesh!”

As you can see, I decided to play around with the sound of the word this time.

Episode 485: Ronovan’s Writes Weekly Haiku Poetry Prompt Challenge 61 ‘Wine’ and ‘Tears’ — September 7, 2015

Episode 485: Ronovan’s Writes Weekly Haiku Poetry Prompt Challenge 61 ‘Wine’ and ‘Tears’

I love the prompt words this week for Ronovan’s Haiku Challenge of ‘tears’ and ‘wine’. Ronovan himself wrote a fantastic Haiku to go with it which you really should  check out. In fact it is such fun participating in this challenge with all of the others, it is really worth having a go at.

Here is my attempt this week (bearing in mind I am now teetotal)!!!

Wine
WWW.Pixabay.com

Episode 167: Fifty Shards of Glass! — February 17, 2015

Episode 167: Fifty Shards of Glass!

Picture the scene…it’s Valentine’s Day, you have gone (reluctantly) to the cinema with your wife to see ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ and when you arrive, you see a woman in handcuffs. Kinky? No, she has just been arrested by the Police!

Only in Scotland could this bizarre event have occurred. Apparently, during an earlier showing of the film, a group of three women became rather rowdy. Alcohol was sold in this particular venue and they had slightly overindulged. This caused to them to not only vomit in the aisles but also to become a bit loud and unruly.

This annoyed one gentleman who went over to them and asked them to pipe down a bit, as presumably, it was spoiling his enjoyment of the film! Big mistake! These women were not going to be told what to do, and apparently there was a fracas where the man ended up getting ‘glassed’!

The stewards promptly called the Police who swiftly turned up to arrest the three disorderly women, leading one off to the Police van in handcuffs! (Not quite the idea she had in mind, I suspect)!

The man and his wife arriving for the next showing waited patiently for order to be restored; vomit to be cleaned up, and blood wiped off of the seats!

I bet E L James had not envisioned her novels to have inspired this kind of scenario! (Actually it was probably a damn sight more exciting than the movie anyway)!

Episode 87: New Year, Old Habits……. — January 2, 2015

Episode 87: New Year, Old Habits…….

Hello 2015! I am so pleased that 2014 has gone, and I now look forward to seeing what delights the New Year has in its sights for me.

I have not really made any New Years resolutions as:

  • They are doomed to failure, I hate to be told that I MUST do something on a certain day, it always usually ends up going wrong.
  • I feel that I hardly have anything left to give up. I have given up smoking, I rarely drink, and no longer eat sweet foods, so there is bugger all left to enjoy, let alone give up!
  • There are enough miserable people at the moment giving up this and that, I don’t need to add to that number.

Anyway, some things never change, despite my efforts. For example,my tendency to be a little accident-prone and just a tad clumsy is still prevalent. My boss very kindly bought all of us staff a lovely china mug for Christmas; each of them different, presumably to match our personalities.Mine was a blue, flowery one which I decided to take home rather than leave it at work where it might get nicked or broken.

Both me and Mr Grump drink tea all day long, and I also like the odd coffee now and again. I have a large mug for my tea, but I only drink a small coffee so my new cup was perfect for that.  I was a little bit grouchy in the morning as I had gone up to get ready and when I had come back downstairs Mr Grump STILL hadn’t done either the washing up from the night before, or made me a drink. I put the kettle on myself, snatched my cup off the draining board, and saw that it was dirty which annoyed me. I turned back to the sink to wash it up just as Mr Grump was trying  to get his cup to the kettle so that I could make HIM a drink! Anyway, you guessed it, SMASH! Mr Grump’s huge, chunky ‘Grumpy Old Git’ cup smashed my delicate china one to smithereens! For once I didn’t say anything, my silence spoke volumes, and Mr Grump scuttled out of the kitchen and out of my way for a bit!

I still had to go to work New Year’s Day, especially as I had Christmas off this year. Mr Grump was going to have to dive me in for about 7am or so, and we were all going to have a quiet New Year’s Eve, Anyway, out of the blue my younger sister invited us to hers in the afternoon for a little while. Her daughter and her fiance ended up coming round and eventually we all decided to go to visit my Mum who also lives locally. Mr Grump met us there and i noticed that he was having a beer, and I knew what was coming….

Sure enough, after a few very loud and raucous games, they all decided to head back to my sister’s to continue the party. It was decided that Miss Hap and Mr Grump would stay the night at my sister’s and I would get a taxi to work in the morning. I must admit I was a bit upset but didn’t want to be a killjoy. After all it was New Year’s Eve. Mr Grump walked me home and then fussed around for a bit before I finally told him to get going as I had blogging to do and I wanted a bit of peace!

I had a bit of a sniffle feeling sorry for myself but soon got lost in the blogosphere catching up on those I hadn’t read and writing my final post of 2014. I decided that I would see who else was working and try to get a lift in from someone else who lives in the area as there are quite a few of us. Luckily I managed to get that sorted so I was pleased about  that.I was just getting ready to go to bed when Miss Hap phoned to say that she was coming home as she missed me and that my other niece’s husband would bring her as they had just turned up there.

That was really nice so we had a little chat, and went to bed. It took me ages to get off to sleep for some reason, but i finally nodded off only to be awoken what seemed like 10 mins later by a bumbling and stumbling Mr Grump.He told me,

“I deshided to come home to be with my baby,  Itsh  still New Yearsh Eve”.

I asked what the time was and told it was only a quarter to midnight. Great! Although I appreciated the fact that he wanted to be with me and had staggered home, he had woken me up! I went back to sleep just in time to be woken up again by the various fireworks that had been let off to bring in the New Year. Lovely. Mr Grump was snoring nicely in time with the dog to accompany the bangs and whizzes of the fireworks.

I did make rather a lot of noise at 5.30 when I got up, making sure I blow dried my hair in the bedroom with the light on of course. Mr Grump got up at 6.30 to see me off to work, how sweet!

Yes. although it is a new year, some things will no doubt remain unchanged!

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