Rhyme and No Reason!

Blogger, author and rhymester who likes to find the humour in life.

Bumping Along! — October 22, 2015

Bumping Along!

I am sorry to report that not quite two weeks into my new job, and only a week out on the road, I have had my first injury! Now as many of you know, I am pretty clumsy and am banging into things so often that it is almost an everyday event, not worthy of a mention.

However, yesterday morning I was to meet up with one of my senior colleagues in order to spend the day with her. As she was coming from a different direction, I was actually meeting her at the patient’s house about 10 miles away just after 8 am.

Of course, I love to be punctual (if not too bloody early) for everything, and had decided that once I had consulted Mr Sat Nav to see how long it was going to take me, and taken in the fact that it was pouring with rain, plus factored in the possibility of rush hour traffic that I should leave at 7.20.

Needless to say, I got there way too early at (7.45), but I spent the time productively loitering in my car catching up with the comments on my blog! I have a squeegee in the car for when the windows get steamed up, which I had used in order to see out of the windows when it got near the time to meet my colleague.

I chucked it into the little compartment just under the steering wheel and went to get out of the car. As it is a lot smaller than my previous yellow car, the squeegee was sticking out and dug right into my knee scraping off the top layer of skin in the process. Had I been on my own I would have uttered a few choice words and hopped around for a bit clutching my knee, but I wanted to try to look professional.

I plastered a smile (or rather a grimace) on my face as I greeted my colleague but was in such pain with the knee that I hobbled over to her, limping lopsidedly. Noticing her alarmed expression I mentioned that I had bumped my knee and laughed it off! I added as a little extra that I was ‘a bit clumsy’ which I immediately regretted as we were administering insulin to the patient! She must have been thanking her lucky stars that I wasn’t coming at her with a needle!

When Things Go Wrong. — September 25, 2015

When Things Go Wrong.

You may remember that a couple of weeks ago I conducted a poll for Writing 101, which asked what type of blog posts you would prefer me to write. Here are the results:

  1. Posts about things going wrong  13 votes
  2. Posts about my family                 11 votes
  3. Something else of your choosing  3 votes
  4. Other                                             3 votes.

I am happy that you have chosen when things go wrong as your winner, as being clumsy, normally gives me a blog post or two to write about.  So, for Writing 101 ‘Take a cue from your readers’ post today, I thought I would share this story with you, that happened at work today.

The morning at work had been pretty busy as was normal, and of course, staff were thin on the ground as is also normal. I had decided to try to get some notes done after lunch, as I was due to go home in just over an hour, and I wanted to leave my colleague as little as possible to do. (Most of the staff on the ward prefer the 12 1/2 hour shifts, but I like the ‘short’ 7 1/2 hour ones).

I had even managed to make a coffee and was sitting at the table in the handover room, where there was a student and a Sister who was signing off some competencies for her.

Suddenly though, there was a commotion outside the room. A new patient that had arrived on the ward just previously was getting rather agitated and was threatening to whack a male nurse with his wooden walking stick! A female care assistant was trying to calm him down but he was swinging the stick around his head trying to lash out at whoever came near him.

The male nurse managed to get past him and into the room where I was writing the notes. Suddenly a stick came through the door and a loud THWACK sounded as he clouted the counter top just missing some of the cups that were there. Myself and the Sister jumped up and tied to get the stick off of him. We did manage to grab it but he was kicking at us and had more strength than we bargained for. We got the stick off of him and avoided the punches that he was dishing out (although the Sister got licked a couple of times) and I rushed to call security.

I went back into the room, as the patient was now sat down and chatting with the Care Assistant. Going to grab a much-needed swig of coffee, I hamfistedly ended up knocking the large mug of undrunk coffee all over the table. It went everywhere. The student’s notes were soaked through, as was everything else on the table, including the tortilla chips that a relative had brought in for us! Ooops, another day in paradise!

Episode 357: Wacky Word Wednesday #5 — June 3, 2015

Episode 357: Wacky Word Wednesday #5

Hooray for Wednesday when I get to fool about with another word that has caught my fancy. This time it is a wonderful word, being French in origin and sounding far nicer than the meaning of it is! May I present to you…..

Maladroit. Oh this poor word blunders and bumbles through life, blissfully buggering up everything it touches! It is ham-fisted and heavy-handed, stumbling and lumbering, tripping over anything in its path.

Being ungainly and uncoordinated, it is graceless and gawky, with its butterfingers and two left feet; a piteous sight to behold. A clumsy klutz who is both inept and incompetent….sounds a lot like me on the dancefloor!!

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