Rhyme and No Reason!

Blogger, author and rhymester who likes to find the humour in life.

You Know You Are Past It When…… — October 20, 2017

You Know You Are Past It When……

  • You forgot what you did yesterday, and it wasn’t due to an over-indulgence of alcohol!”] I like to keep a diary which I have done for years. The problem is when I go to write it up; sometimes I forget what I have done and had to try to work my way backwards to jog my memory!
  • Instead of having a bit of ‘afternoon delight’ you end up nodding off! You know the scene, you have got the house to yourselves, a good couple of hours of uninterrupted time alone to do whatever you want, so you fall asleep on the settee!
  • The only time you wear something ‘trendy’, it is accidental. You are at that stage now where comfort is a must; forget fashion, you want practical! So when you do put on something that is trendy, it is more likely that after 20 years it is finally back in fashion!
  • You still talk about ‘records’,’discos’ and ‘going to the pictures’. Most of the youth of today do not know what a record is, and have never had the pleasure of listening to their favourite song jumping about all over the place where the record had become scratched or warped! Kids don’t go to discos (unless it is the school disco for some reason), they go to clubs (well at least I think so as I am way old to frequent such places)!  I still talk about ‘going to the pictures to see a film.’ No, that is old hat. It is called a MOVIE. Pah!
  • You type out a text message in full. Now I am pretty ‘with it’ I know an emoticon when I see one, and I can even do a smiley face. However, I do not understand all this shorthand typing the young favour when sending a text. Even worse is the lack of punctuation!
  • You are getting ready to go to bed when the young are just getting ready to go out for the night! You know what it’s like you got up early, work was busy, by the end of the day you are shattered, and end up in bed no later than 10 pm! Now for young people, the night is just getting started at 10 pm. They have had a few drinks, and are raring to go, ready to have a good time. When you are getting up early the next morning (another sign of being past-it), they are just falling into their beds!
  • Your daughter tells you that her friends’ parents are all in their 30s and are so much more fun and laid back, you are the age of their fuddy-duddy grandparents with your practical clothes and sensible shoes designed for comfort rather than fashion.
  • You are always reminiscing about the ‘old days’! Yes, things were so much better back then, of course. Life was rosy, and we never got bored; just a stick and a bit of string and we were happy! Music was so much better, summers that much warmer and felt that they lasted longer. The problem is, your kids have heard it all before and are not impressed.
Episode 449: Broken English. — August 8, 2015

Episode 449: Broken English.

Now I am quite an old-fashioned, traditional woman as some of you might have noticed. I am also partial to using some out-dated words or phrases as we have such a rich and beautiful language. It is a shame to let them disappear into the mists of time, shrivelling up with lack of use.

I have noticed something disturbing over the years however, that has become more prevalent as technology advances and the world becomes smaller. The fact that I have a young daughter who likes to keep up with the latest fads and trends, also brings this home to me, and I don’t like it one bit.

I may not be the best at writing, I understand that my grammar leaves a lot to be desired at times, and I am careless and shoddy with my proofreading (I know, being the Typo Queen is not something to be proud of). However I do try to make sure that I at least make some use of the language that I was brought up with. I am proud of being English and as such become very annoyed that my mother-tongue is being messed about with, chopped up and put in a blender, and coming out with chunks in it that I am unfamiliar with!

Now, I do not wish to offend anyone at all, this is my opinion, and being a bit of an old ‘stick in the mud’ I like the language just the way it is, thank you very much.

To illustrate my point, here are a few examples

Text Talk WTF??? (See, I can do some of the trendy abbreviations). You will probably not be surprised to know that when I text someone, I write the whole lot out in full, complete with punctuation. I know, I am extremely uncool. (but I do love a smiley face) but I hate all of this cul8tr stuff. I mean, what the hell is that? The first time I saw it I tired to read it as a word, thinking it was ‘culture’ and that someone has pressed the 8 by mistake and did it in a hurry, (Something I am always guilty of).

All these abbreviations are fine,(if you can understand them), but I do worry that our kids are losing the art of writing. I remember when I was at school we had to learn how to write all the different types of letters, using the appropriate greeting and how to sign off, which I am not sure they still teach, despite the fact that letters do still need to be written on occasion.

The other thing I get annoyed about, is nicking words from other languages when we have perfectly good ones of our own! Miss Hap does it all the time (she knows it annoys me)

“Mum, have you got any Bobby pins?”

“What? Oh, you mean hair grips”!

Grrrrr.

Trash/garbage- rubbish

Cotton candy – candy floss

Gotten – got

You get the idea. Or calling each other ‘bruv!’ I am not your bloody bruv, nor am I your ‘mate!’

I know I am getting to be an ‘Old Codger’ but I can’t help it. Is it just me or does it wind you up that written language is becoming so informal and casual?

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