Rhyme and No Reason!

Blogger, author and rhymester who likes to find the humour in life.

Episode 192: If It Ain’t Broke…. — March 3, 2015

Episode 192: If It Ain’t Broke….

Today’s Blogging 101 task is to edit my tagline or the name of my blog. Now I am quite happy with the name of my blog. I chose ‘Edwina’s Episodes’ for a number of reasons. The first being that I decided to use my middle name of Edwina, originally as I wanted to remain anonymous.

I then needed something that would go with it that was catchy and said a little about my blog. As I was just mainly writing about situations that had happened in my life or little thoughts about things, I decided that ‘Episodes’ would convey the feeling of my life being like a soap opera, and each little event being a mini episode. I suppose  I wanted continuity and consistency, which I hope to have achieved!

Now my tagline – A humourous look at the life of an everyday woman

I wanted that to say what my blog is actually about, I have had a few thought about this actually, and might consider changing it. However, as the saying goes ‘if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it’ and it has served me well so far.

I have thought of changing it to laughing at life or laughing my way through life. 

I really can’t decide….

What do you think? I have put a little poll in so you can vote if you feel like it!

Do you write poetry? — March 2, 2015

Do you write poetry?

Thank you so much for giving us so many opportunities to promote our blogs and find others!

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Episode 191: Cheesed Off! —

Episode 191: Cheesed Off!

Now as some of you may know, I rather like my food. and one of my absolute favourite foods is cheese. Now I was pretty upset last week when I was told that I can only have 3 portions of dairy daily, and that I should only ever have a matchbox sized piece of cheese as a portion! Now that to me, is a bite, not a portion , but I am trying to heed the advice as I know that it is for my benefit.

Anyway, in our family of cheese lovers,(apart from Mr Grump who hates it), it is very often customary for us to break out the cheeseboard after a meal, or it comes out if we are having a buffet or something. Either way, it is a prominent feature.

Now most of us like to have something to go with our cheese, and crackers are usually the perfect accompaniment (along with a glass of wine for some). You can buy those boxes of different crackers that are perfect for the occasion.

Even on the ward where I work, we have the option of cheese and biscuits for our patients as many of them enjoy this as a snack, or again, after their meal.

You might wonder where all this is going. Well, a woman and her step-mother went for a meal in a hotel, and the step-mum fancied some cheese and biscuits. Nothing unusual here, in fact quite a reasonable request.

Someone, unfortunately took her request literally! What turned up was a bowl (yes a bowl) of different types of cheeses (so far so good I suppose), mixed in with an assortment of biscuits! Not crackers that you would normally associate with cheese, but (by the looks of it) a random selection from a box of  ‘Family Circle’ biscuits!

Now I am not sure whether I would like to try the Custard Cream and cheddar combo, or perhaps the Jammie Dodger and red Leicester, or for a special treat the Bourbon and brie! Every one’s a winner in my book!

Episode 190: This is Me —

Episode 190: This is Me

I decided that I would participate in Blogging 101 this month as I am still rough around the edges when it comes to blogging! I wanted to learn more so here I am on day one. The task for today is to introduce myself and tell everyone why I am here. so here goes!

To start with, my name is not actually Edwina. It is my middle name, and I originally used it because I wanted to remain anonymous. I don’t mind being called Edwina at all though, as it is much prettier than my actual name of Judy! As I have plastered my blog all over my Facebook account now, and am no longer anonymous, it doesn’t matter which of the two names you want to call me.

My blog is all about trying to see the funnier side of life. I don’t think we have enough laughter in our lives. There is all the hustle and bustle, and stresses of everyday life that wind us up and stress us out, and I just want to try to put a smile in there somewhere to break it up a bit!

The fact that I suffer from  anxiety can sometimes make it a bit tricky to try to think of something funny, but at the same time, I have found blogging does help me with my own issues, it is very cathartic.

Anyway, I like writing about the mundane (the everyday situations we all find ourselves in); the silly (I do love a bit of silliness! I am always showing myself up by doing the wrong thing, or putting my foot it); the wacky (occasionally, I read a news story that is really strange or weird) or just the bloody ridiculous! (Anything and everything else).Sometimes I even like to write a little rhyme or poem, just to add a bit of variety.

I like to put my own take on things, and although my personal stories and experiences are all true, I have written them from the humorous angle, preferring to see the funny side of a situation. The point of this is to make the reader (hopefully) smile, or if I am really lucky, chuckle. I would love it if I could get a guffaw, bellow or roar of laughter, but this blog is still young!

One last point. I do love to hear from people. I am lucky that I do have people who comment on my blog. I love to interact with people and hear their stories and experiences as well, especially the funny ones. Or just pop in to say hello.

As the great Charlie Chaplin once said,  ‘A day without laughter is a day wasted’

Episode 189: Smooth(ie) Operator! — March 1, 2015

Episode 189: Smooth(ie) Operator!

Miss Hap has discovered a new drink which she loves, Oreo Smoothie! Now forgive me if I am wrong, but aren’t smoothies supposed to be healthy? You know, made with fruit and veg and skimmed milk….that kind of thing, not ice cream and Oreos (I can’t bear them myself)!

Anyway, she has been nagging me for ages to buy the ingredients in order to make this delightful drink. I have so far not obliged her,  as her once a week indulgence is plenty enough for such a sugar-fest. I did however, promise to make her a ‘normal’ smoothie.

I have actually got a smoothie maker that I have had for ages, but now never really gets used. I dragged in out of the corner it was hiding in, gave it a bit of a clean up and gathered some ingredients together.

Now I have to mention that I was not really in a very good mood. We were going to have our usual Sunday roast, but whilst Mr Grump was cooking the meat, it gave off rather an unpleasant smell. Once cooked. although it looked gorgeous, none of us fancied it anymore due to the weird smell, so that put paid to that! Hence the reason why I was crabby. (I had a healthy dinner instead)!

Anyway, I poured the milk into the smoothie maker, and asked Miss Hap to get the ice out of the freezer whilst I got the bananas. She had decided that she didn’t want anything else with it as she ‘doesn’t really like that much fruit’ (a fact I know all too well)!

When I turned back to the smoothie maker I saw that all of the milk had ended up on the worktop. There must have been a bit missing from the machine which I hadn’t noticed, despite the fact that it was an essential component!

I got more milk and we used the food processor to mix everything up in, I poured out some of the drink and gave it to my daughter. She took the smallest of sips and her face said it all. I went to give some to Mr Grump and when I came back all of Miss Hap’s drink had suspiciously gone. She said that she had enjoyed it and sloped off upstairs.

I, meanwhile, was left with one hell of a mess to clean up. As I went to start the washing up, I noticed that the washing up bowl was filled with what looked uncannily like banana smoothie! Great! She had thrown it away as I thought. I chucked out the bloody useless smoothie maker as well. Oh well, at least my kitchen is slightly less cluttered now!

Episode 188: My Friends, The Google Family! —

Episode 188: My Friends, The Google Family!

Today i have decided to pay homage to the great all-knowing, all sing and dancing ‘Google!’ Where would we be without it? How many times do you hear someone say “just Google it” when you have made yourself look a prat by not knowing something obvious? Yes, Google is the font of all knowledge, loved by all, but adored by dunces like me! Here follows my top reasons for using it:

‘Doctor Google’

We’ve all done it. Felt ill and looked up our symptoms on Google, only to scare ourselves half to death, convinced we are going to die imminently. It is worse if you look at images as well. After being told I had Impetigo, I was doubtful but looked it up when I got home from the doctors. Some of the images I saw were really horrendous, and not ideal tea-time viewing! Thank God I have already started taking my tablets before my scabs get to that stage!

‘Masterchef Google’

I do actually have a few different types of cookery books, but for some reason can never find what i am looking for. Miss Hap is very fond of giving me extremely short notice that she needs to bring in cakes or biscuits or something for school. Masterchef Google has come in very handy here. I have some wonderful recipes for cupcakes, ginger biscuits, and even a rhubarb and ginger grumble (that was for me actually when we had a load of rhubarb growing in the garden and I needed to use it).

‘Professor Google’

Ah this is one of the most useful of the google family! I use for the times Miss Hap has some particularly difficult homework that I have no idea how to do, but don’t want her to know how stupid I am. I can ask her to leave it with me for a bit, then use prof google to find ways to help me understand what she has to do in order that I can explain it to her!

It is invaluable for help with maths, geography, history and art; actually it has helped both myself and my daughter in researching most of the subjects she takes at school. (These kids don’t know how lucky there are, we had to plow out way through massive reference books or encyclopaedias)!

‘Detective Google’

This is a handy one for those that like to check people out (if you are feeling particularly brave, you can type your own name in and find out all about yourself)! If you are a nosey type of person, cautious, or inquisitive you can try to get a bit of a lowdown on people to see if they are hiding any dodgy photos or crazy family members. Unfortunately, unless they have done a particularly horrendous crime and been splashed all over the news, the chances are you won’t find out any decent gossip about them!

As you see my google friends are pretty handy, I know I might have missed some of the important ones out. Which ones do you use?

Limerick Contest —
Episode 187: Shedding Some Light on the Subject! — February 28, 2015

Episode 187: Shedding Some Light on the Subject!

I know this is a bit controversial but hate those bloody energy lightbulbs! Yes, I know,shocking isn’t it?! (Well they might be if they produced any sort of power).  I am aware about carbon footprints and all that sort of thing, but I do still like the good old-fashioned 60 watt bulb.

I have lived in my house for 11 years now; It was a brand new property which had special fittings in the upstairs landing and hall downstairs for the energy lightbulb. That was all very lovely except for a couple of years later when I had to get a replacement, none of the shops sold them!II had to send off for them and they were pretty expensive at £10 apiece! Compare that to the £1 or so cost for a normal light bulb and you can see one reason I hatred them.

Having a brother who is good with electrics helped as he took out those fittings and put the general ones in, so I could use either standard light bulbs or energy bulbs as the mood took me.

Surprisingly, I do quite often use the energy ones in the hall as have got a little better over the years. It no longer takes about 5 seconds for the light to realise that it has been switched on, and kick into action, It is almost instantaneous nowadays.

A couple of nights ago Miss Hap informed us that we had a power cut, well, kind of anyway. She had turned the light on in the bathroom upstairs (it has a normal light bulb) and it blew causing the lights to all go off. Mr Grump had to climb up to the fuse box and flick the switch back on to restore light.

Anyway Mr Grump fitted a new bulb and all was sweetness (and light) in our household. Well, until I went to have my bath the next morning, I turned on the light to be greeted by this eerie kind of greenish glow. It was pretty horrid and I literally had a quick dip before getting out of there.

Miss Hap also moaned about the light when she went to the bathroom, It was a really ugly low energy lightbulb, with the emphasis on ‘low energy’. We nagged at Mr Grump to change it as it was giving us a headache.

When I came home from work later on, I saw that indeed the bulb was changed, Great, he managed to do one of the chores I had left him before I went to work. During the evening I needed to nip to the loo so I went to the downstairs one,

The eerie greenish glow appeared casting its gloom in the room. It seemed to make everything appear grubby. I was not impressed with this at all. It’s bad enough that it had the audacity to be called a ‘light’ bulb, but to have this almost CSI quality of showing up every speck making everything appear grimy was annoying.

Mr Grump managed to persuade my niece’s fiance to take him shopping today as the weather was appalling and we needed some bits. I decided to leave them to it and didn’t go with them. Big mistake, Not only did they forget to buy some normal light bulbs but they decided to stop off at the pub on the way home for a ‘quick pint’!

It seems that he was running a bit low on energy and needed a bit of perking up himself!

Spread the Love- Share Your Blogs Here! —

Spread the Love- Share Your Blogs Here!

This is a wonderful opportunity from the lovely Karen whose blog is always a pleasure to read.

fillyourownglass's avatarFill Your Own Glass

 

Yesterday I participated in the Spread the Love Challenge by creating ten four-word sentences about love.  Today, and throughout this weekend, I would like to spread the love by asking bloggers to share their work here.

Since I began my blogging experience last September I have found that, with a few minor exceptions, the blogging community is one of love, support, and encouragement.  I would like to pay it forward by offering everyone a place to share a link.  I do not have a huge audience like our friend Jason over at Harsh Reality, but I am growing a wonderful group of friends here at Fill Your Own Glass with nearly 400 followers. (Thank you, thank you, and thank you a million times for clicking that little button!)

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Episode 186: Counting Sheep! —

Episode 186: Counting Sheep!

ADVISORY

**********I have made a joke at the end of the post which some people may find offensive, particularly if you are vegetarian or Welsh!!! No offence intended!********

If you live on a posh housing estate, you don’t expect to be bothered at 3am by a rowdy group making a racket and causing a disturbance. You might be cross about being woken up and shout at them out of the window, or you might even call the police. The residents of one such estate in the north of England, are at their wit’s end as none of these solutions have any impact. The reason for this is…….the culprits are four-legged, and fluffy sheep!

Apparently these sheep are breaking free of their fields, and making their way to this housing estate, leaving a trail of droppings in their wake. Some of the local residents have complained that it is not very pleasant taking their babies out in their buggies, and having to dodge treading in it, or trundling it around on the wheels!

Another problem is that the sheep are rather partial to a tasty plant or two, They like to snack on people’s prize petunias and such like, and clear off without clearing up! This is very bad form and the neighbours have had enough of it.

Nobody seems to know who these bothersome bovines belong to,so the police have very helpfully dished out tines of paint! Yes the residents are expected to try to catch one of these troublesome tearways, and splodge a bit of paint on it in order for them to be identified!

I had to laugh at this story. I know that if we ever had the same problem where I live with wandering sheep, Mr Grump being both Welsh and a chef would be in his element. The problem is, he wouldn’t know whether to shag it or cook it!

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