Unfortunately, I have not been able to blog as much as I would have liked over the past year and I especially miss catching up with everyone. I have managed to get on Facebook though and have at least been able to see what you have all been up to. Even if I haven’t interacted much, I am still lurking about in the shadows!
I have just finished Uni for my second year in my nursing degree and have got 7 weeks left of a very busy placement where I feel there is so much to learn. However, as we have just had horrid Path & Pram plus medications management exam I am finally free from the revision that has been taking over my life for the past god knows how long!
All assignments are now finished and passed and I am just awaiting the results of that exam (in about 3 weeks time) to be able to relax (albeit temporarily) and look forward to my 3rd and final year)!
I had a look at my poor neglected blog and decided that I was going to move back from self-hosted to WordPress as it was due to expire and I cannot afford to lash out for another few years, plus it is cheaper doing it this way. As some of you may remember though, my technical skills when it comes to blogging are pretty rubbish and when I transferred everything back I lost all of my images (sound familiar? I did this before once as well)! Not only that but I have had to change themes as the other one was a plugin for which I would need a business account). Anyway, suffice it to say that I am now fiddling and faffing about trying to add images to all of my posts. (Hopefully, they are all stored on my pc but it is finding them, as I forgot exactly what I called them when I filed them)! Oh, and to top it off all my followers seem to have legged it! (Not that I can blame them though as I have been a little elusive lately!
So what I am blabbering on about is that I am still here despite my blog looking bloody awful and pictureless. I am doing my best to get it looking pretty again but not sure this theme is one I will stick with yet. I am hoping that now I am back in the warm embrace of WordPress my site won’t keep falling to bits despite my best efforts to muck it up when I try ‘improving’ it.
If anyone is still around and reading this, THANK YOU! I will try and be a little more active with my blogging this year. 🙂
This week Linda has given us, spoke for our Stream of Consciousness posts, which can be used as part of a word or as a word itself, whichever we choose, and there are bonus points available if we don’t use it in the first sentence! I am using it as part of the word spoken.
I always seem to find myself talking about how far behind I am with my blogging on Saturdays in these posts but as it is becoming pretty frequent I will have to stop doing that. I am also going to mention today that which should not be spoken about! You know what I mean, something else I am harping on about a lot lately, and it has to do with the .profession that I have chosen.
I have to tell you though, that I passed the assignment that I had to resubmit and although we have been back at Uni since the start of the week, I can now fully relax in the knowledge that I am a fully fledged 2nd year now! We go out on placement at the end of May, something else which I am pretty excited about too!
I think I have spoken enough for now!
This week Linda has given us, picture for our Stream of Consciousness posts, which can be used as follows: Write about, or theme your post on the first picture you see when you sit down to start writing. You don’t need to describe the picture necessarily–you can even put yourself in it if you’re not already there. Enjoy!
Well, the first picture or rather pictures that I saw when I sat down to write were the ones that are in my images folder that I use for my blog. A couple of weeks ago my blog was reset to an earlier date due to some running problems. After spending nearly two full days in contact with technical support to get the blog to this point, I was so happy to see that it returned, that I didn’t realise there was a fatal flaw – no images were showing up on the posts or in my media!
The very first ones on my blog and also the homepage images were there so that is why I didn’t realise there was anything amiss. Last night though, the penny dropped! Where were all the images hiding? The only ones in my media were those that I had recently uploaded. I did a bit of poking around, to see if I could figure out where they had gone, then eventually turned to my ever faithful friend Mr Google, for some answers.
I was not impressed with the complicated procedures regarding file permissions and other stuff that I didn’t understand, but despite, messing up my blog before by tinkering with stuff I have no clue about, I managed to change them but still no difference. Another suggestion by my helpful friend was to re-upload the entire lot as they could have got ‘lost’ during the reset. Bugger, that is going to take time. Luckily this blog is not that old, but I still have loads of posts to sort out.
Not only do I have to re-upload them but of course, I need to re-assign them to the particular post they were meant for! I have started on this mammoth task, but it is going to take ages. Please bear with my rather naked blog if you find it imageless, I am working on it!
I just wanted to put you in the picture!
Having taken a break from blogging for nearly a month, I am finding it a little tricky getting back into the saddle which I wasn’t expecting. I used to post almost daily about all kinds of subjects, yet now I find myself struggling for something to say.
Don’t get me wrong, I am sure I could bore you all to tears talking about my nursing experiences, but I have already mentioned nursing lately, and I am wary of over-egging that pudding, instead, I will drip feed you slowly over a period of time. (Why does everything with me always come down to food analogies)?!
Speaking of which, I had my diabetic review (on my birthday as it turned out), and things seem to be a bit haywire there. My weight has gone up even more, as have my blood sugars (according to the Hba1c blood test), and my liver function is deranged (hopefully I will find out why when I speak to GP tomorrow although it could be to do with my weight). This is all rather ironic as I am trying to get myself into shape before (hopefully) qualifying as a nurse, (bugger, I said I wouldn’t mention nursing)!
I am going to really have to put a lot of extra effort into living a healthier lifestyle, and no doubt I will post about my trials and tribulations on the way. Well, that will certainly give me plenty to write about!
Linda’s Just Jot it January and Stream of Consciousness post for today is a little different as you will see from the rules below. I always enjoy a challenge and look forward to seeing where this post goes.
Without further ado, here is today’s prompt.
Your prompt for #JusJoJan and Stream of Consciousness Saturday is as follows: read closely. When you’re ready to sit down and write your post, look to the publication (book, newspaper, permission slip from your kid’s teacher, whatever you find) closest to you, and base your post on the sixth, seventh, and eighth word from the beginning of the page. Enjoy!
The book that was closest to me ‘Critical Thinking Skills’ by Stella Cottrell and I chose the sixth, seventh and eighth words from the introduction, which are…’when it comes.’
When it comes to writing Stream of Consciousness posts, I think I have got the technique pretty much off pat. I put this down to the fact that I write nearly all of my posts in this manner.
I like to write pretty much as I speak because I feel that it is friendlier and also gives you a little insight into my personality. As you can see from the choice of book that was closest to me, at Uni this style of writing certainly will not do, and I have to stop myself from being ‘too chatty’ and instead be more formal and professional. I need all the help I can get on that front, hence the reason for that book and several others being stashed in my desk, ready to be pored over when needed.
Stream of Consciousness writing gives me the freedom to let my thoughts flow and just go with them. However, there might be a downside to this as my thoughts may be a little jumbled or jumpy at times, which is, unfortunately, the way that I am, so there might be a bit of weaving around before I get to the point. I might not even get to the point if I go off on a tangent and think about something else which is often the way with these types of posts. As there is no editing allowed other than fixing typos, this may be a little confusing.
The fact that there is a prompt word with our Stream of Consciousness posts makes it more interesting, as I get to see how others have interpreted the same word in their posts. It is surprising when it comes to Stream of Consciousness just how many perspectives there are, and how diverse we are as writers and/or bloggers. That’s why I love them!
I try using Social Networks
To bring people over to my blog
But being so tech-illiterate
I feel like I’m lost in the fog.
Linked in is more like locked out
I don’t really know what to do
Twitter makes me bitter
As I haven’t got a clue!
Pinterest lost my interest
Many months ago
On Instagram, I have no likes
Because I am so slow.
Facebook I can cope with
I don’t get in a rage
I’d love for you to visit
And ‘like’ my Facebook page!
Those of you that suffer from anxiety and depression know how difficult it can be to come through the other side. I know that when I went through a particularly bad phase, it was as much as I could do to get out of bed, let alone function. This poem will give you an idea of what I felt like.
You wake up but still feel so tired as if you’ve had no sleep at all.
Your thoughts all muddled and fuzzy you want to curl up in a ball.
Your head feels so constricted like someone is squashing your brain
Your body has lost all momentum and your soul is crying in pain
Yet, there’s no logical reason why you want to just be on your own
To lock yourself up with your sorrow and be in that zombie like zone
You are unable to communicate though God knows, you have tried
Your inner most thoughts want to break free but your mind keeps them locked up inside.
It can be debilitating to yourself and affects all aspects of your life. Your family, friends and work colleagues try to be understanding and patient, but it ‘s hard for them, especially if you don’t want to communicate with anyone and shut them out.
Here are some of the strategies I have learned to help me cope with anxiety and depression.
The most important thing is to recognise when things are starting to become challenging and tell someone about it. I know when everything is starting to get on top of me, and I am struggling to cope, so it is at that point I make an appointment to see my doctor to try to get some help as soon as possible.
Be open and honest. I know it can be difficult for some people, as mental health issues are often brushed aside or stigmatised. It is that feeling that you won’t be believed because there are no visible signs, or worse, be told to ‘pull yourself together and snap out of it!’ If only we could.
Don’t beat yourself up about it. Another tricky one, because when I am feeling depressed, I go back over everything; conversations I have had, situations I have been in and berate myself for something that I have said or done which has made me look/feel stupid or might have offended someone. It is very often not the case at all, but when you feel useless or helpless in yourself, you feel that everyone else thinks that you are too.
Try and get out into the fresh air. When I am feeling particularly bad, I just want to shut myself indoors and hide away in my little cocoon of security. The problem with this is, it is tough to get out of this rut, and in a way, it makes you feel worse. You become wrapped up in yourself, sometimes not bothering to get dressed, or having a wash. It just adds to the general feeling of worthlessness and self-disgust.
Write or start a blog. Now I know this might seem ridiculous if you don’t feel like doing much, especially if you have cut yourself off socially from everyone, but I found that this was the best way to help me get through. In fact, it was the very reason I started my blog. I found that by trying to see the funny side of things and making others laugh kind of made me feel valued in some way. Also, I made friends but did not have to physically meet up with them and therefore wasn’t shy or embarrassed. There were no awkward silences, and I could reply to messages or comments when I felt ready to do so.
Of course, it took some time to build up my blog, but I never thought anyone would read it in the first place, it was just for me to express myself in the best way I could. In the end, I met some of these wonderful bloggers sometime later at the Bloggers Bash in 2016. By then, I was much better and ready to socialize in person!
Take any help that you are offered. In the past, I have been to counselling and also have had some Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) Sessions which I have found helped me enormously. Yes, it was sometimes hard to physically get myself out of the house to attend these appointments, but occasionally I asked my husband to take me. I was always glad that I went as it helped me understand why I felt the way that I did, plus I was given tips to try to help myself.
Aim to achieve a little more each day. It may sound obvious, but doing things in bite-sized easy to manage chunks is so much better than hurtling headlong into forcing yourself to complete tasks then feeling resentful and burned out when you are unable to cope with the self-enforced pressure. For example one day I would get up, have a bath and hair wash, the next I might do some washing up or walk to the shop as well,
Don’t Rush it. As I mentioned above, it is much better to make sure you are feeling well before you try jumping back into everything in full-on mode. I once made the mistake of returning to work too early as I was worried about taking time off, but I was not quite ready, and it didn’t do me any favours. It was extra stressful as I was trying to appear my ‘usual’ self when apparently, it was obvious to others that I wasn’t myself at all.
There are no hard and fast rules of course, as we all cope with things in different ways. I have found that these strategies were crucial in helping me cope with anxiety and depression.
Let me know in the comments if you have any other ways of coping .
I have found this useful website (Mental Health. Org. UK) that offers a booklet that can be downloaded with tips to help overcome anxiety and depression. Please click the link here if you would like more information.
I would just like to give a huge, warm welcome to everyone that has come over here from Edwina’s Episodes. I am so very sad to have to let that go, especially as I had built up such a huge community there, but I am hoping to continue my blogging friendships her now.
I will still be writing about the kind of things that I did before, anecdotes and funny stories, as well as my quest for a healthier lifestyle. Of course there will be poems, well rhymes and maybe the odd limerick or two and perhaps I will continue with the haiku writing that I enjoy.
I still intend to collaborate with my lovely friend Sandra from Wild Daffodil blog with her fantastic shell and pebble families which I have been writing some poems for.
Although I am not going to bring the entire blog over here, (in case it self-destructs), I have decided that I will publish a few of my latest posts that were on Edwina’s Episodes. This blog hasn’t been active for a while and I would like to have something here that I have written recently, and something for people to read whilst I establish this blog.
Thanks to all of you that have put up with the glitches and Gremlins that happened during the last few weeks, and most of all, thank you for sticking with me! I really appreciate it.