Rhyme and No Reason!

Blogger, author and rhymester who likes to find the humour in life.

Episode 45: Don’t Let The Grass Grow Under Your Feet… — November 14, 2014

Episode 45: Don’t Let The Grass Grow Under Your Feet…

I do love autumn…the beautiful colours, the fresh, crisp days,the overgrown garden…(hang on a minute, that bit I don’t love)!I I don’t have a very large garden at all, but the 40ft I have got is nearly all grass, apart from a little path that goes straight up the middle, and the border where I have my rose bushes.

The reason that the grass is so long outside is all Mr Grump’s fault! He is chief gardener and mower of the lawn.I might occasionally dead head a rose when the need arises, but I like to appreciate, rather than create, or maintain! Mr Grump made the fatal mistake of lending our trusty lawn mower to my younger sister (Mrs OCD), and her husband (Mr Cack-Handed). He should have known that it would all end in disaster!

The end result was that the lawn mower went ‘BANG’, the cable was somehow cut, and both of them blamed the other for the demise of our mower. However, Mrs OCD assured us that they would carry out the necessary repairs,and return the  mower back to us fully restored to life….

Now I know my sister is pretty meticulous in everything she does, and she is a dab hand at most  things (cooking, sewing, crafting, painting and decorating to name but a few), but I know she is not too keen on DIY jobs, which meant that Mr Cack-Handed was going to take up the challenge to revive the dead mower!

I have to enlighten you at this point, that a screwdriver, pliers and a hammer are the extent of Mr Cack-Handed’s tool kit! Mr Grump has a whole load of stuff in his tool armoury  which clutter up my shed and cupboards, but he at least can be relied upon to tackle most DIY jobs with a relish and do a half-decent job of it! My poor hapless brother-in-law, by contrast hates DIY with a passion, and is not known for his accomplishments in this department.(Although when it comes to composing lyrics of a song, or playing a guitar and performing, he is amazing).

A couple of examples of his ‘handy’ work: He built my sister an archway in the garden which she has covered with roses, unfortunately it was a little wonky to say the least, and after a few failed attempts to straighten it out, Mr Grump and my nephew stepped in and sorted it. The other ‘job’ he botched was the guttering outside their patio doors. A clip was missing and it leaked so he found a Barbie credit card ( God knows from where), folded it in half and wedged in place! To be fair, that has lasted over a year in all weathers!

Anyway….we waited with bated breath for our  mower…and waited….and…borrowed next door’s as it was summer and the grass was taking over the garden! Mr Grump did say he would do it himself, but I think it was a pride thing and Mr Cack-Handed wanted to do it.

Finally we were told it was repaired (the cable replaced) but not re-assembled as he couldn’t remember the order in which he had dis-assembled it! Mr Grump went over to collect it. As he was putting it back together, he realised that the cable was too short; it has been wrongly measured and cut too much. Luckily my brother was visiting from Malaysia that day, and suffice to say, he and Mr Grump fixed the mower!

The only problem now is waiting for the ground to dry up. Ever since we have had the mower back, it has either been raining or the ground too wet to mow properly., and as I have not got Mr Grump insured yet, I don’t want him getting blown up!!

Meanwhile. Mr Grump informs me that he and other family members are trying to build up a bit of a tool collection for Mr Cack-Handed, leaving odd tools over there when they visit him. Personally, I am not sure this is such a good idea. After all, you wouldn’t leave a load of ingredients with someone who couldn’t cook, and expect them to produce a gourmet meal!

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