Rhyme and No Reason!

Blogger, author and rhymester who likes to find the humour in life.

Christmas Limericks. Rude Reindeer — December 13, 2017

Christmas Limericks. Rude Reindeer

I do love a limerick and thought that after the success of some of my Halloween limericks, I would share some Christmas ones that I wrote, over the next few days. I hope that you enjoy them.

There was a young reindeer named Rude reindeer

Who worked for a jolly old dude

Pulling a sleigh full of toys

For the good girls and boys

Even though he was not in the mood!

Episode 463: Tuesday Tidbit: Foreign Bodies (18+) — August 18, 2015

Episode 463: Tuesday Tidbit: Foreign Bodies (18+)

Today I thought I would do something a little different for the Tidbit, and look at some of the strangest objects that have ‘accidentally’ found their way into people’s rectums and have had to be removed in hospital!

  • Aerosol cans: For some reason deodorant is rather popular!
  • Glass bottles and light bulbs! You would have to sit down very gingerly.
  • Oranges and aubergines. What a terrible waste of food.
  • A coffee jar. I should imagine it was instant rather than filter.
  • An egg. That had got to have been hard-boiled surely.
  • Curtain rod. Not the right way to draw attention to oneself!

Some people always go that little bit too far!

Episode 170: Politeness Pays…. — February 19, 2015

Episode 170: Politeness Pays….

I have written a couple of posts about manners, and how I hate it when people are rude, arrogant or just plain obnoxious. We are very quick to judge people on their behaviour, and here are some examples of how first impressions matter…

A man getting off the Tube politely let another male passenger go before him. The other man started pushing and shoving despite being told by the first man that he was not trying to block his way. Anyway, after a bit of argy-bargy, it was suggested that the first man might like to ‘go f**k himself.’

Later that evening, the first man was conducting some job interviews. Guess who turned up?! Unfortunately, he didn’t meet the requirements and was unsuccessful in getting the job. They did have a laugh about their earlier scuffle though apparently!

The  second story involves a little girl of five years old. She was in a shop with her granddad after school, looking at toys. They often visited this shop and the little girl would spell out the names of the toys she wanted. This was educational for the little girl and enjoyable for them both.

On one of their visits, as the little girl was spelling out one of the toys she wanted, a woman approached them and gave the granddad an envelope. She then disappeared after remarking how pleasant and polite the little girl was. In the envelope was a voucher for £10. The little girl was thrilled as she had enough money to buy one of the toys on her wishlist.

The idiot on the Tube might have wished that he had remembered his manners!

Episode 132: Monkey Business! — February 1, 2015

Episode 132: Monkey Business!

As I mentioned yesterday, I bought a craft magazine with some wool and various patterns with suggestions on what to make it. Miss Hap decided that she liked the monkey pattern, and with the amount of wool we have, we can actually make three of them. Being the type of person that Ii am, I got stuck straight in to it.

Now I am left-handed and my daughter is right-handed and she can’t knit yet. I know in primary school they did have a brief lesson, but she hadn’t quite grasped it. My attempts to teach her have not been successful because I can’t knit the other way round either!

We settled on me doing the first monkey just to make sure that I was able to actually make it myself (I can knit but have only tried knitting a toy once which was a bit of a disaster),

I knitted up all the various parts of the monkey quite nicely, but as my sewing skills are pretty rubbish, the finished result (as you can see) is a poor little scruffy monkey that already looks like he has been kicked around the block a few times!

Miss Hap, however, loves it!

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