As if I am not clumsy and awkward enough, I also have yet another disadvantage to add to my long list of unfortunate traits…I am left-handed! I don’t think you right-handers realise how much of a nuisance this can prove to be to us at times….

I remember how awkward it was at school to have this ‘affliction’. When I was very young we were taught how to knit (I don’t think it is generally taught in class now). being the only leftie, I found it quite tricky to pick up, but for once I was lucky as the teacher was able to show me how to do it left-handed. Mind you, that doesn’t alter the fact that every knitting pattern I have ever attempted to follow assumes that everyone is right- handed and I just have to swap everything round!

P.E. was also a little odd for me at times. When we were learning how to throw the discus or javelin, I had to stand at the opposite end of the line to the others,as our missiles would be travelling in opposite directions and we wanted to try to avoid any collisions or people getting hurt!

The only thing I don’t do left-handed is set the table the wrong way around! It was drummed into me from a very early age, the correct way to use a knife and fork,and lay a table,so that has never been a problem!

Mr Grump. is also left-handed (he puts the knives and forks out the leftie way). so he understands the difficulties that we face. A few years ago, I was trying to teach my daughter how to tie her shoelaces, She couldn’t get it no matter how many times myself or Mr Grump tried to show her (neither of us were dexterous enough to be able to do it right-handed); in the end my Mum taught her how to do it!

It is so much easier being a leftie now that I am older as some lovely people have considered our plight and  invented some rather practical gadgets for us! The left-handed scissors are marvellous; no more cack-handed attempts at trying to cut things out nicely, hacking away frustratedly.The fountain pen! At school we had a very fussy history teacher who insisted we use fountain pens, and there were only a few left-handed nibbed ones at the time. If you tried with a normal one, half the time you would be scratching about with no success, until suddenly SPLAT! A huge blob of ink would land on the page smudging anything you might have already managed to write!

Even sitting next to a right-hander could be awkward, I have to turn my book/paper 45 degrees to the left when I want to write, and I find that occasionally,if the person is sitting to my left, and are a little close, I will unintentionally bump them with my hand thereby mucking up their work!, or they end up accidentally  nudging me and messing mine up!

Even GUITARS can be a problem!  A couple of years ago Miss Hap went to guitar lessons (they didn’t last long as she didn’t have the concentration  span; she would upend it and twirl it round like a double bass, or swing it back and forth kicking at it)! Anyway.. I sat in on these lessons (I felt really sorry for the poor guy trying to teach her) and watched carefully, planning to help her practice at home. Well, I could only really attempt to get the same notes out of it if  turned the guitar the other way up…far too complicated for my brain!

Mind you, after all this time I have adjusted and adapted to the rather biased right-handed world we live in. After all, I am already pretty clumsy and heavy-handed, I can, and do trip over anything (sometimes even nothing), and I am practised in the art of walking into the glass patio door! (Oooh, I still remember one Christmas at my sisters,where I went smack into the glass doors landing on the floor. luckily they were extremely tough,and didn’t break. although there was a nice knee and head print on the door Suffice to say it kind of spoilt my evening and I went home with an egg-shaped bump, and massive headache! Still I provided some unexpected entertainment for them all, as they were pretty open in clutching their sides laughing at my misfortune)! So being a leftie is a drop in the ocean compared to my other weaknesses!