One of the things us nursing staff get told a lot by some of the relatives is that,
‘you have the patience of a Saint, I could never do your job’. It is strange how much our patience varies depending on who we are dealing with and what the situation is…..
On Thursday and Friday I was working in my normal Bay, and one lady in particular was pretty ‘vocal’ . Now she is 97 years old and extremely deaf (the hearing aid she wears has a flat battery I think) so she talks at FULL BLAST. Now she had been a moved to my bay from a side room as she did not like to be on her own.
I was checking that each patient was eating their breakfast when I noticed she hadn’t even got any. So I asked her why not. After repeating the question several times increasing the volume until she could hear me she replied
” I DON’T LIKE ANY OF THAT MUCK YOU SERVE HERE, IT’S ALL A LOAD OF RUBBISH!”
Fair enough , but she had to eat something so I asked if she liked bacon which she did, Great, good start. “Sausage?”
“NO I DON’T BLOODY LIKE SAUSAGES!” Fine. “Eggs?”
“I ONLY LIKE FRIED EGGS, NOT ANY OTHER KIND”. I assured her that I would get her some bacon and fried eggs and trotted off to phone the kitchen.
Now there were two of us in the Bay and only five patients at this point as one of the beds was closed and we were not able to take any new ones in. Luckily most of the other ladies were either feeding themselves or being helped by the other nurse.
I placed my order with the kitchen and in due course one of the staff appeared carrying a tray. I was disappointed to see that there was scrambled egg with the bacon that I had ordered even though I had specifically asked for a fried egg. I tried my luck with my patient anyway!
“WHAT DO YOU CALL THAT? I TOLD YOU I DON’T LIKE THAT SORT OF EGG. WHY DON’T YOU LISTEN?”
I tried to explain about the kitchen sending up the wrong egg and I would change it but no, she was not having it. I tried offering a bacon sandwich, Nope. She was not having it and I was severely berated for my incompetence for good measure as well.
Annoyed with the kitchen I phoned the help desk again (yes we can’t phone direct, everything is through the helpdesk). I explained what had happened and they told me that as the meals were pre-prepared it may not have been possible to have a fried egg due to their not being enough staff to make one.
Fuming, I was muttering to myself about how I could go down there myself and cook the bloody egg. How hard is it to cook a fried egg for Christ’s sake?! It’s not as if it takes long.
Anyway, my patient was mad now, and refused to eat anything. I knew this was not going to bode well at wash time – and it didn’t! She had come in with no toiletries so I had put some of our soap in her washbowl and brought some disposable wipes over to wash her with.
“YOU ARE NOT COMING NEAR ME WITH THOSE! WHERE IS MY SOAP AND FLANNEL?”
I explained that they were at home and that I would have to use our stuff for now. She was not happy but did finally agree to let me help her, and also get her dressed in her own clothes that someone had just brought in for her.
“WHERE IS MY VEST”?
“It is just here”
“GET OUT OF MY BLOODY WAY , I WILL DO IT”
“Ok. here it is”
“TIGHTEN MY SHOE”. NO NOT LIKE THAT, WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU?. THAT STRAP IS NOT LEVEL.”
“Sorry, let me try again”
“NOOOOOO, I SAID TIGHTER!”
This went on for a bit until I got it right. She did have a sandwich an hour after the failed breakfast attempt, but when a visitor came, she told them she had ‘nothing to eat, and her hair wasn’t brushed’ (actually it was because I did that wrong and suffered her wrath for it). She also told the visitor how much worse she felt since coming into hospital because of the appalling way we looked after her!
Now I know that by the end of a very long two days (I have amalgamated them into one so you get the gist) my patience was wearing a bit thin, but it is my job to look after my patients, and actually as gruff and crabby as she was, we did actually get her to laugh, and I got a lovely hug from her!
Now if Miss Hap had tried any of that kind of talk with me, things would have been very different!
What a gorgeous post… Lord save me from becoming a cranky rude old lady! You gave me a good giggle to start the day with my 83-year-old mum here for the long weekend…
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I am going to be a cranky old lady, and as rude as I can be. Oh, I left out the swearing that this lady loves. I didn’t get it but she called one nurse a F***ing, c***ing. C***. An interesting combination I thought and yes it is the ‘c’ word that she favoured! Have a wonderful weekend with your mum.
x
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Oh oh! Well done for keeping up with her and not losing it!
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It did get a bit much after a while because I just couldn’t do anything right for her!
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It’s amazing how much you can put up with, from an oldie!! Then you get home,,and the same happens…. No way!!!
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You do need to have quite a lot of patience in my job! 🙂
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It’s like mine, but I’m at the opposite end of the scale, with 4-5 year olds!
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Yes it is exactly. I was thinking that! They say that when you get older you revert to childhood! Some of ours love to show off!
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I am beyond impressed you were able to keep your patience. When I encounter a rude older person at the store or in a restaurant I try to remember that he or she may be sick, in pain, lonely, etc. While it does not excuse the behavior it does help me to not react in a similar rude way. To be able to do this daily, though, makes you a special, caring person indeed!
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Thanks Karen. Some of the things she said were actually quite funny (albeit very rude), and I did have a bit of a chuckle when I was out of the way! When she laughed though, it was just so sweet I gave her a hug! Funnily enough every time I went to her I held her hands (as I do everyone), and she was screaming at me, whilst holding my hand!
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They are lucky to have you
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Thanks so much, Luckily all of us nursing staff are pretty patient. 🙂
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I must add my voice to the many others who say you have the patience of a Saint. I look after one mother with dementia, that coupled with a full time job is enough to put my head away. Three or four oldies in the same room might possibly be the straw
that broke the camels back lol That said, when in form, they are the best craic ever lol
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It is pretty tricky looking after someone with dementia (our ward does have more than its fair share). so you too have got your work cut out, what with working a full time job as well. Yes they can be pretty hilarious at times, and it is lovely to see them enjoying themselves. and having a laugh! 🙂
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I got punched in the mouth by a demented retired First Sergeant when I did my long term care rotation. I admire anyone who can work with geriatrics, because I decided then and there that would not be my subspecialty. Fortunately occ med patients generally don’t come out swinging.
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We have had staff punched by a retired boxer who was a pretty big bloke and still very strong. It can be really tough as they don’t always realise what they are doing. So sad really. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts and commenting.
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Your patients are fortunate to have someone as kind and understanding as you looking after them. 🙂
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Thanks Tonya It can be a bit tricky at times though! 🙂
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Oh dear, that made me smile. My husband John was a nurse for years and I love his stories too ☺
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Thank you, yes there is always something going on! 🙂
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Judy E Martin
Hello, and thanks for stopping by. I am Judy, in my (very) early fifties and decided that life definitely gets more interesting as it goes on! I am a wife and a mum and have just finished University as a Registered Nurse, after having worked as an Associate Practitioner in the NHS. I am also a poet and the author of my debut book, 'Rhymes of the Times.' I love to laugh, and I love rhyming words too, so I joined the two together, and my book was born. I am currently working on another book in the series also. I am a prolific blogger and enjoy writing funny stories, anecdotes, and anything really that takes my fancy.
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