This Post is inspired by Ronovan’s Writes Be Wonderful on Wednesday.
As I was thinking about what to write here, I came to the conclusion that actually, I am not really great at connecting, at least not in most situations.
The fact that I have a blog and belong to an online community means that I do connect with others on a daily basis, sending comments back and forth, and getting into interesting conversations, and finding the funny side of things. This seems to be where I am most comfortable!
I am very shy and can sometimes come across as aloof in person, despite that being far from the truth. It just seems that I am so much better at expressing myself with the written word rather than the spoken one! This does not bode well in social situations though. Funnily enough, although I hate job interviews, I have always been quite lucky in that I have overcome the fear and secured the job, on many occasions. That was probably due to the fact that I knew I had to do it, or I would be jobless and penniless!
As far as my family and close friends are concerned, I am much better at making connections. It has always taken me a little while to get to know people to the point where I can just be myself with them. Last year for example, we had a family friend come over to visit us from Sweden where he now lives. He has known me since I was 9 years old, and we were in my mum’s back garden with other members of my family. He couldn’t get over how much I was joining in, laughing and making jokes. That is the real me, but not that many people get to see it because of my inability to connect well with others I do not know.
One of the other ways I connect with people is again through the written word but this time, a poem which is nearly always a funny little ditty. Whenever there is a family wedding, special celebration or even sad event I have always written a poem for that person. It is just my way of letting them know that I care for them, even though I am not good at saying it face to face.
We are not a ‘lovey-dovey’ type of family, Well, at least we were not brought up like that, My parents did not ever tell any of us that they loved us, as that is just the way it was then. However. all of us constantly tell our kids that we love them as it is important to have that security and knowledge to know you are loved. Love is certainly the strongest of connections, and I do have that bond with my daughter.
Mainly,in one way or another, whether written or spoken, I connect with people through humour. I think it is so much easier to make a connection with people if you are all laughing together!
We don’t always be like an open house and let everybody look what’s in the fridge… lol! I also don’t just let everybody read within me like in a book. That’s my private choice what I want to share of myself. But I have to say that today I share more consciously and also writing helped a lot to open up and stand by myself. I am not hiding anymore because of a lack of self-esteem… it simply is my decision… 😉
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It is good that you have made that choice and have managed to regain your self-esteem 🙂
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… still a journey… but I guess I laid the base 😉
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A lovely post. I love to connect with others with laughter too. I’m quite socially shy and I think that’s why some of my blogs are about being able to make people laugh. In life, I could quite easily become a hermit. Thanks for sharing and being so transparent.
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Hi and welcome. Thank you so much for your kind comments, I think us shy people do find laughter a great way to connect with others. 🙂
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I have noticed one thing since beginning to blog. I think blogging has helped me to expand my desire to be connected further than the computer. This “being connected” to others on-line has made me want to do so more outside in my community. As a naturally socially reserved kind of person, this has been an added benefit for me.
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It is wonderful that blogging has encouraged you to want to be more proactive in the community, 😉
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I think we all enjoy different levels of social interaction. What’s stimulating for someone may be overwhelming for another. One nice aspect of the blogging community is that you can engage as much as you like. I agree that humor is a great way to connect with others, too. That’s probably one reason your blog is so successful. You have a real gift for connecting with others through your humor, wit, and kindness. 🙂
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Thank you so much for your kind words Tonya. I am thrilled to be a part of this wonderful blogging community and connecting with lovely people like you 🙂
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Thanks, Judy! 🙂
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A great post Judy!! I love a good connection!!! Some find it hard, some find it easier, but hey, we all have to, to an extent! 😊
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Yes, that is very true. Some people are also easier to connect with than others too! 😉
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There is that…! ;P
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This is a lovely post, Edwina. It’s nice to learn of another side to Judy and it’s a real credit to you that it’s not all filth! It fascinates me how people play out in public. I am so worried people see my depression or shyness that I become extroverted and play Cat-the cool-cucumber. We seem to be so comfortable writing, it’s a rare chance for people to see who we really are. You have a lovely personality, warm, caring, down to earth and downright funny… now can I borrow that tenner
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I can relate to the aloof perception. I feel so uncomfortable making small talk that I am certain some people think I am aloof, when really I just want to make connection with out all the pointless chatter – I seek real connection – or laughter, that works too!
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Yes, I am rubbish at small talk, and probably come across as a total idiot as well as being aloof!
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A lovely piece that I can really empathise with. I’m much better in writing than in person. Thanks for sharing.
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Thanks so much for your thoughts Wendy
🙂
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I so look forward to your posts. Your shyness intrigues me. You are such an interesting person. I know there is so much fascinating Judy in there!
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Why thank you Linda, that is really nice of you to say, 🙂
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This is me!
Judy E Martin
Hello, and thanks for stopping by. I am Judy, in my (very) early fifties and decided that life definitely gets more interesting as it goes on! I am a wife and a mum and have just finished University as a Registered Nurse, after having worked as an Associate Practitioner in the NHS. I am also a poet and the author of my debut book, 'Rhymes of the Times.' I love to laugh, and I love rhyming words too, so I joined the two together, and my book was born. I am currently working on another book in the series also. I am a prolific blogger and enjoy writing funny stories, anecdotes, and anything really that takes my fancy.
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