Rhyme and No Reason!

Blogger, author and rhymester who likes to find the humour in life.

Hot, Sleepless Nights — May 29, 2018

Hot, Sleepless Nights

You know I am always moaning about the British weather? I wrote this about one of the things in particular that drives me crazy when the weather is so unpredictable, one minute roasting hot, the next freezing cold!

The weather was so hot and sticky

It was disturbing my precious night’s sleep

I spent all night with the fan on

Duvet on the floor in a heap!

I decided it was time to take action

And packed the heavy duvet away

In its place, a thin bedspread

I’m bound to be cooler this way.

The first few nights it was lovely

I didn’t have to keep mopping my brow

Between the fan and the bedspread

I slept so much easier now

The weather started to get cooler

The heat wave had burned itself out

The bedspread  pulled up into service

In the night when I fumbled about.

I still felt hot and sweaty

The next night when I fell into bed

Old Grump was cocooned in the bedspread

And all I could see was his head!

I still had to have the fan on

Enjoying the delicate breeze

But in the dead of night, I was awoken

My body had started to freeze!

I tried to grab some of the bed spread

But greedy Grump slept like a log

I was now bloody frozen

And tried to cuddle up with the dog!

She wasn’t having any of it

And scampered off down the bed

This called for desperate measures

I tried to snuggle the Grumpster instead!

The next night I had already decided

The duvet was back in its place

With this weather so temperamental

It is always there just in case!

#SoCS Tail or Tale — February 10, 2018

#SoCS Tail or Tale

This week Linda has given us, tail or tale for our Stream of Consciousness posts, which can be used any way we choose; we can use one or both.

I have been chasing my tail all this week, which means that my poor blog has suffered as a result. Unfortunately, due to me catching the dreaded lurgi and taking 3 days off work and cancelling some clinics that I was going to attend as well means that I have got a lot of hours to make up!  We have to do a certain amount of hours in practice as well as at Uni. I have only got another 3 weeks left in placement so am fitting in an extra 12 hour shift a week to get it done as I have a voluntary placement the week after (voluntary in the sense that we get to choose where we go, not choose if we want to do it)!!!

When I was younger, it would not have bothered me, as I have always given 100% effort at work, no matter how physical the job, and have worked any more hours than I do now. However, due to me being more of a bedraggled old hen as opposed to a spring chicken, it is making me rather tired and it is not long after I get home that I flop into bed! I am not complaining, but just feel sad that I can’t do all the things that I want to do as I can’t squeeze it all in!

Still, I have the weekend off and a couple of days for my birthday next week, so I will get time to recharge, and I might even get chance to read a do a bit of blogging and catching up. I will be getting two weeks off near the end of March as well which I am looking forward to, then April is the start of my second-year of Uni. My goodness, how the time has flown! Just one more result to come in, I passed the others that I was waiting for, so fingers crossed, it is just the one resubmission I have to do.  Still, I got this far so hopefully will pass that and go on to tell the tale!

SoCS Tail or Tell
#SoCS prompt – ‘tire’ — February 13, 2016

#SoCS prompt – ‘tire’


Today for Linda’s Stream of Consciousness prompt we have ‘tire.’

I have got a bit behind with my blogging this week. Last week I worked all over the weekend as I did this week, and I had a couple of days off midweek. This seems to have thrown me off a bit for some reason, and last night I could have gone to bed as soon as I got in, I was so tired!

I did manage to ‘stay up’ until nearly 9 pm but was struggling! Mr. Grump has a week off now as it is school holidays next week, and needless to say, he has come down with a horrendous cold! Neither of us got a good night’s sleep!

I had a tickly throat and Mr. Grump was snorting and blowing his nose, and not being very quiet about it either! I was almost ready to give it up as a bad job and get up at 1 am but did manage to finally nod off until the alarm shrilled through the torpor and forced me to get up.

I dragged myself out of bed still feeling exhausted, came down into the front room with my cuppa, switched the lights on and got a bit of a fright! There sprawled out on the settee covered with a blanket was Mr. Grump. Roxy was asleep at his head (almost on top of him) and he had two long strips of tissue stuffed up his nostrils! He looked ghastly  and  had come downstairs so as not to disturb me. Bless him, he already had!


Sleep, Precious Sleep! — December 4, 2015

Sleep, Precious Sleep!

I might have mentioned how tired I am trying to adjust to working full-time again. It is so odd as I have always been used to working so hard, yet don’t remember ever being this shattered (must be my age)!  I have been in bed before 9 pm every night and slept pretty much all night. Miss Hap stays up later than I do.

Speaking of which, I had to stay up till 10 o’clock last night, ON A SCHOOL NIGHT!!! She is currently in Germany at the Cologne Christmas markets with the school, and we had to drop her off at 9.30 pm to get settled on the coach which was leaving at 10 pm.

Needless to say, today was busy at work and I had a student with me as well. Due to my ‘late night’ I was tired and a bit crabby, especially as we didn’t get back to the office to eat our lunch until 3 pm!

I am so glad it is Friday and I can wind down a bit (and stay up late if I want to, although I am usually too knackered)! Not so tonight anyway, we have to be at the school at  3.15 AM to pick her up!! Hmmmm. Looks like I’ll have to go to bed soon. Talk about being old before your time – I feel about 100!




Wacky Word Wednesday….On Thursday! — October 8, 2015

Wacky Word Wednesday….On Thursday!

I forgot to do a Wacky Word Wednesday post for yesterday, despite feeling that I was missing something! I decided that I will do it today instead, and have got the perfect word to sum up how I feel after the day I have had!

Knackered.  Yes, washed out, worn out, tired out and generally pooped! It is overworked, overtired, and over-emotional! Exhausted and drained, shattered and sleepy, not to mention dozy and drowsy.

It has another meaning that can also apply to me. Broken and battered. on the blink, and, basically buggered! It is on its last legs, and more than a bit past it!

Episode 487: Tuesday Tidbit. Sex Drives…From a Screech and a Roar to A Cough and a Sputter! (18+) — September 8, 2015

Episode 487: Tuesday Tidbit. Sex Drives…From a Screech and a Roar to A Cough and a Sputter! (18+)

For the Tuesday Tidbit this week I thought I would have a light-hearted look at  how the sex drive changes over the years.

The teenage boy is usually  desperate to have sex and tries his hardest to find someone that will sleep with him. When this fails, it is not unknown for them to have a stash  of adult mags, under the bed to ahem, pore over!

The teenage girl, however, does not know how to deal with her raging hormones, She does not want to risk sleeping with someone who isn’t in love with her, only  to be dumped and have them blab and brag about it to all and sundry, causing her huge embarrassment. No, she will stamp and stomp around the house bursting into tears at the slightest provocation.

Both sexes in their twenties are usually raring to go when it comes to sex. They think they invented the Karma Sutra and are at it constantly several times per day, anywhere and everywhere they can. Forget eating and sleeping sex really is ‘the food of love’ at this stage.

During the thirties, things can slow down a little, especially for women, and particularly if they have young children. Tiredness can be a real passion killer, as can little uninvited visitors to the bedroom in the middle of the night. Men are more willing to risk it, but are often rebuffed, or end up with a little person wedged in the middle of the bed, which curtails any further sexy thoughts!

The forties and fifties. Women can very often reach their sexual peak during their 40s and 50s. more so if the kids are grown up! This is where the men very often slacken off due to ill health, or perhaps pressures of work. Things are starting to die down now and those all night sexual marathons are distant memories, replaced by perfunctory monthly couplings. This is where the women can feel rather let down and frustrated. However, for some that are going through ‘the change’, they are more than happy to lay off the sex for a while as they don’t need anything else to make them feel hot and sweaty!

The Sixties and beyond. This is a time when the menopause is usually finished, and some people are more relaxed due to having more time on their hands having retired from work. This is also when things can really go downhill for some men, Help is at hand, though, (or rather somewhere else), and there are those little blue pills that might be able to perk up the love life.

Now I know why they like to be called ‘recycled teenagers!’

Episode 470: Ronovan’s Writes Weekly Haiku Poetry Prompt #59. Bird and Red — August 24, 2015
Episode 399: Wacky Word Wednesday #8 — July 1, 2015

Episode 399: Wacky Word Wednesday #8

It’s Wednesday, time to have a bit of fun with a wacky, weird or wonderful word (or perhaps all three)! It’s going to be a sizzling hot day today apparently, but I have decided not to get all hot and bothered with a raunchy word. No, I am going to keep things cool, with a great word that has an almost comedic ring to it.

Ramshackle. This is a bit of a rundown and rickety word; dilapidated and derelict, like an old ruin, crumbling and collapsing, teetering and tottering on the brink of breaking down into tiny fragments.

It is flimsy and frail, wobbly and worn-out, neglected and quite frankly knackered! Actually it sounds a lot like me! 🙂

Episode 351: Wakey, Wakey! — May 29, 2015

Episode 351: Wakey, Wakey!

Now I am quite an early bird, and get up at 05:15 when I am working,  so it is almost inevitable that my body clock wakes me up early even on a day off. I am at my best in the morning anyway, and can quite happily get on and do things until everyone else gets up and our day begins.

Mr Grump usually gets up earlyish as well, but he had been out last night and had a few beers with some of my family, so was a little ‘tired’ this morning! Miss Hap, being on school holidays is also loathe to get up too early as well at the moment.

My sister had phoned at 8am so I had a nice chat with her for a while, but by the time it got to 9am I decided it was about time Mr Grump got up as I had chores for him to do! Anyway I went in the bedroom and he was sound asleep with Roxy snoring at the bottom of the bed (not even she had bothered to get up)!

I got in bed, he didn’t move. I pinched his arm, he muttered and turned over. Roxy had seen him moving and decided that she was well overdue for her walk. She went to the top of the bed and licked Mr Grump’s bald head! Her tail was swishing against the wooden headboard and making a bit of a clonking noise which was obviously irritating Mr Grump as he told her to get down, which she did!

I was annoyed that he didn’t get up,  so I went in to see Miss Hap who was half awake. I had a little cuddle with her but she was tired and heavy-eyed so I went off downstairs to make a cup of tea (noisily)!

About 10 o’clock Mr Grump finally clomped downstairs and got himself ready to take Roxy out for her walk. I was cooking myself a boiled egg for breakfast but decided that Mr Grump would probably have breakfast when he came back, and I told him I would wait and have breakfast together.

I didn’t! I had been up for ages and my egg and pitta bread were ready so, in the end,  I decided to cook a bit of bacon to put in with it. I was just finishing it off when Mr Grump and Roxy came back from their walk. I picked the last slice of bacon up with the tongs and I don’t know what happened but it ended up straight on the floor to Roxy’s delight!

I was fuming and stomped off to eat what I had left! Of course, it was all Mr Grump’s fault for getting up late, and me having to cook my own breakfast!! It put me out for the rest of the day!

Episode 275: Window Shopping! — April 7, 2015

Episode 275: Window Shopping!

It is a lovely day here today with the sun shining, and my cold is a lot better (It has decided it has had enough of me and had gone to settle on Mr Grump instead)! Myself and Miss Hap decided it would be nice to have a quick trip into town and treat ourselves to a very unhealthy breakfast (bang goes the lbs I have lost so far)! I have to say a sausage and egg Mcmuffin really hits the spot when you have been ‘healthy eating’ for a few weeks!

Anyway, we  looked around for a bit and got some odds and ends, then I noticed a lady that did ‘threading.’ Seeing as my eyebrows were a bit straggly I told Miss Hap that I would quickly get them done, Of course. I had forgotten how much it bloody hurts, and needless to say my eyes streamed with water. Before I had properly come back to my senses, she asked about doing my top lip as well.

Oh. I hadn’t realised that it was a moustache in progress. so I told her to go ahead. Having never had this threaded before, I was rather taken aback by the pain! Miss Hap must have noticed my grimacing (I had my eyes screwed tightly shut as well) as she grabbed my hand and squeezed it for comfort, bless her.

That ordeal over with I tried to leave with my dignity intact. but it was not easy with a snotty, runny nose and streaming eyes (I could have put it down to the cold I suppose)! Miss Hap wanted to go to the phone shop to get a replacement sim card as she had damaged it. so we headed there next.

I am never keen on going to these places as they are of course very knowledgeable about phone technology etc and I am a dunce. I asked for the sim , and then the assistant started going on about me being overdue for an upgrade and did I want this or that?! No I bloody didn’t. My daughter gets rather fixated on things and although she already has an iPhone it is not the latest one. She is not getting it either so I did not want him discussing upgrades or I would never hear the last of it.

I looked at him with my blotchy, red, snotty face and told him sternly that I was not prepared to discuss upgrades now, and he decided it might be a good idea to shut up and give me the sim card!

Once we had finished shopping, Miss Hap and I got in the car to come home. Now on the way into town Miss Hap was playing ‘Rapper’s Delight’ (I have very little new stuff in my car). She loves it and knows most of the words, and recently Mr Grump had fitted this huge speaker thing covered in carpet(?) into the back of my car so my stereo sounds quite loud!

She had cranked up the volume and we were both making a nice racket along with the Sugarhill Gang on our journey. However, on the way out of the multi-storey car park I had to Wind my window down to put the ticket in the slot to get out, and it wouldn’t go back up! All the way home I tried to no avail. Miss Hap was not so keen now on the stereo loudly blasting out Leo Sayer’s ‘When I need you’ and I refused to turn it down!

We were lucky it was such a lovely, sunny day and didn’t get soaking wet!

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