I hope that you are enjoying Linda’s Just Jot it January posts. We are starting week two now, but it is not too late for you to join in the fun if you feel like it.
Here is today’s prompt word.
Your prompt for January 8th, 2018, brought to you by the many layered pensitivity, is “Pants.” Use it any way you’d like in your post. And make sure you visit pensitivity at her blog, “pensitivity101” to read her post and say hi! Here’s her link: https://pensitivity101.wordpress.com/
Pants. Just the sound of that word brings a childish giggle. Silly really as we all wear them, (well, most of us do that don’t go ‘Commando’)! Of course, being British, the type of pants that I am referring to are underwear, panties, knickers, underpants, or whatever else you want to call these undergarments, not trousers!
There seem to be as many different types of pants as there are names for them and, I think many of us women have certain types of pants that we use for different occasions.
- The thong (with their cheese slicer type string, which cuts in all the wrong places), on the one end of the extreme.
- The ‘pulling pants,’ you know the lacy scratchy ones that you wear on a night out if you are feeling lucky, they look nice but are as uncomfortable as hell.
- The ‘time of the month pants.’ The grotty ones that have gone grey in the wash and have loose bits of elastic hanging off, that nobody is going to see.
- The ‘shapewear pants’. The pull ’em up and tuck everything in kind of knickers that come up to just below your boobs, and sometimes just to the tops of your thigh, the idea is to give a smooth and slim silhouette. Not bloody likely! With my stomach, the fat has to go somewhere and if it is squeezed into a slinky vice-gripped tube, will likely spill out over the top, making it appear as if I have two sets of boobs! Also, the minute you sit down the damn things will slowly start to roll up and gain momentum as the fat flops out. This leads to numerous trips to the loo to sort them out and a great deal of muttering and cursing at the annoyance of them.
- The ‘Bridget Jones’ or ‘Mummy’ pants. These are a close relation to shapewear above but not as tight usually and only waist-high as opposed to chest high. They are ideal for when a big meal is imminent, and you want a bit of room to fit all of the courses in. It is a good idea to wear these with the elasticated waist trouser or a loose-fitting dress. Might be a bit of a passion killer though if you are out on the pull!
- The bloomers. I know nobody wears these anymore but I couldn’t resist including them. My Nan used to wear these and they came right down to her knees where they were elasticated. There was plenty of room for manoeuvre, and with a pair of ‘stays’ on top, not only would they keep you warm, but also keep young ladies chaste as it would take ages to get that lot off!
- The ‘work pants.’ These do not need much explanation; they are the comfy, colourful knickers that are normally (in my case) part of a pack of five or even seven that will do for everyday wear. They will not show you up if you get run over by a bus (does anyone else’s Mum ever say that you need to be wearing clean knickers in case you get run over by a bus)?
Now, I wasn’t going to write about men’s undercrackers but I felt it would be mean to leave them out, so although I have no personal experience of wearing them, it won’t stop me from commenting on what I think of them!
- The thong or if you prefer the ‘posing pouch’. YUCK! I am sorry, but not many people look good in a thong and certainly not men! I am sure they are just as uncomfy for men as they are for women too!
- The briefs or ‘budgie smugglers.’ Again, in my opinion, they are not that flattering either. They conjure up images in my mind of the type of thing an oiled up bodybuilder wears with massive shoulders and legs, but not much in the trouser department if you know what I mean! ‘Budgie smugglers is overly generous.
- The ‘Y fronts.’ Have you ever seen such ugly undies?! They seem to come in a high-waisted plain white colour that your grandad wouldn’t be seen dead in, or a really lairy paisley or garish pattern in vomit-inducing lurid colours. Definitely a passion killer!
- The boxer shorts. These are in my opinion, the best of the lot. There are the loose, hang free type, or the rather snugger, show off the lunchbox, type of affair. You can probably guess which ones I prefer!
Sorry if this post hits a bum note with anyone!
Comfy pants for me 100%! Gone past the stage of worrying about what others think of my undies lol!
You and me both, Sis! 🙂
No bum notes here Judy lots of giggles though ??
Glad to give you a giggle, Sis 🙂
?you did Sis ??
You forgot about incontinence pants! Ha!Ha! You can tell I have an elderly mother!
HA! Yes I did forget about them!! 🙂
LOL!! I like my bloomers, with no stays please!
Ha! Roomy and comfy is the name of the game for you. 🙂
Yep!! And not ashamed to say it! lol
Haha too rich. I love that the sponsored links for this post are trying to sell me some boxers.
HAHA! Really? How funny! 🙂
You’re a hoot, Judy! What a thorough and delightfully funny post on pants! Have a great week! ?
I am happy you enjoyed it Tonya. Have a lovely week too 🙂
Thanks, Judy. ?
That last line cracked me up!
I’m 90% granny panties — nude, white, black, pink. But now and again, I’ll granny colorfully 😉
HA! Comfort is key! 🙂
Judy, your comment about two sets of boobs made me laugh so much I practically choked. I can only wear white cotton as I am allergic to everything – so boring !
There is nothing wrong with white cotton Robbie. I often wonder why I put myself through the torture of shapewear, when it certainly doesn’t give me the shape that I want to achieve!
Bum note! LOL! I needed this laugh. ❤
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So glad you enjoyed it Colleen, I couldn’t resist that last line!! 🤣😜
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I needed that laugh. Your sense of humor always cracks me up. LOL! 😀
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That makes me very happy to hear Colleen. 🤣🤣
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Judy E Martin
Hello, and thanks for stopping by. I am Judy, in my (very) early fifties and decided that life definitely gets more interesting as it goes on! I am a wife and a mum and have just finished University as a Registered Nurse, after having worked as an Associate Practitioner in the NHS. I am also a poet and the author of my debut book, 'Rhymes of the Times.' I love to laugh, and I love rhyming words too, so I joined the two together, and my book was born. I am currently working on another book in the series also. I am a prolific blogger and enjoy writing funny stories, anecdotes, and anything really that takes my fancy.
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