Rhyme and No Reason!

Blogger, author and rhymester who likes to find the humour in life.

#Writespiration #74 The Red Lipstick — January 6, 2016

#Writespiration #74 The Red Lipstick

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I have decided that for this week’s Writespiration, created by Sacha Black, I would actually try to write a Flash Fiction story as opposed to a poem. (This is very new for me). The prompt is ‘The Red Lipstick.’

Jane strolled back casually towards the dorm.  She had given up a night of passion with Rob to babysit for one of the teachers at the last minute and had spent the night there.  Still being early on this lazy Saturday morning, Jane anticipated how much fun she and Rob would have making up for lost time.

As she drew closer, her stomach fluttered with excitement.  Rob was so gorgeous; she still couldn’t believe he had chosen to go out with her.  He had a gaggle of giggling admirers, not least ‘Slutty Sue’ the pouty blonde with the overdeveloped curves to counteract her underdeveloped brain!  Jane’s thoughts always turned spiteful when she thought of her bitter rival for Rob’s affections.

Rob had been a player, but Jane was convinced she had changed him, ignoring warnings from her friends that he was still messing around.  He was in love with her; he had even told her so two weeks ago when he was trying to relieve her of her virginity.  Of course, she gave in to him on hearing this, as he knew she would.

She entered the old building now, which was still, and quiet, and noticed that Rob’s keys were not in the door, as usual, waiting for her to let herself in.

“Rob, ROB, are you in there?”  Jane hammered at the door.

Eventually, she heard a ‘click’ of the lock and Rob called for her to come in.  He looked ghastly.  His face pale, hair messed up, and the room stank of stale beer and cigarettes.  Jane wrinkled her nose but leaned over to greet Rob with a kiss, trying not to recoil from the rancid blast of putrid air that emanated from his mouth.  As he reached up to put his arms around her neck, the sheets slipped off his shoulders.

There written in bright red lipstick across his back  was one word.  ‘ Sue.’

 

Just Jot It January 6th – Cloud —

Just Jot It January 6th – Cloud

Clouds

Today’s prompt word is ‘cloud’ for Linda’s Just Jot It January. As you can see from my photo, today we have blue skies and puffy white clouds which make a change from all the awful rain that we have been having recently!

Anyway, I am not going to talk about that type of cloud, I am going to venture into the unknown (for me) and talk about storage clouds. I am not very tech savvy at all. I can use the computer to do roughly what I need to do, although there is still a lot more to learn. Thanks to some fellow bloggers, I can now use Picmonkey and Canva (the basics at least), and have learned over time more about some  of the WordPress features.

What I am now trying to get to grips with is this little cloud symbol I have on my laptop. I know it is ‘One Drive’ and that it saves everything to it from all of my devices which actually seems a great idea. The thing is I have got Dropbox and some Google photo thing where my photos go to as well! I know that Elizabeth was also talking about her cloud in this post and deleting photos from her phone, whether or not they would still be on the cloud.

What I want to know is, if I have got all these pics in all these places taking up all of my laptop memory, where is the best place for me to keep them, and is it safe to delete them from all the other places?

Any help would be greatly appreciated! 🙂

 

 

 

Wacky Word Wednesday —

Wacky Word Wednesday

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Welcome to the first Wacky Wednesday of 2016. I thought it would be fun to carry this on as it seems to e pretty popular. For anyone new to my blog, this is where I get to revive a word that is weird, wacky or wonderful and give it a new lease of life. The English language is so rich and varied with new words being introduced all of the time, that I thought it would be nice to look at words that are not getting the usage they deserve! This week’s word has been suggested to me by Geoff who, being an author, is no stranger to words, wacky or otherwise!

Bombastic. Oh. this is a snooty  stuck up kind of a word. Loving the sound of your own voice, prattling on pretentiously whilst all around are nodding off! It is swaggering self-importantly, indulging in gibber jabber that is grandiose but meaningless.

It awful oration, that is too flowery or flouncy. The speaker needing to get their head out of their arse in order to appeal to the audience. It is inflated egotism, verbal diarrhoea and a load of bull!

Hmmm reminds me of old school assemblies when the head got on her high horse!

The Great Book of Lists Chapter 1: Treasures From Childhood — January 5, 2016

The Great Book of Lists Chapter 1: Treasures From Childhood

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La Duchesse d’Erat has come up with a brilliant new challenge where you make lists on a range of topics which changes every week. The idea is at the end, you have a whole host of lists that are filled with memories, humour, and all kinds of other emotions experienced. If you want to get involved, check it out here 

The first list is regarding childhood treasures. I always think it is lovely to look back to those carefree days and remember some of those special moments. So here is my list.

  1. Spending summer days at the beach with the family. We always went prepared! Ice box, windbreakers, dinghy, buckets and spades, more food, flasks of coffee, spare clothes, towels, and of course, yet more food!
  2. My Nans. Both of my nans were characters in their own way. As I may have mentioned before, they lived next door to each other when we were very young. Both were strict, formidable women, who were bloody hard workers. They were also damn good cooks, and many a good meal was had at both of their houses!
  3. Our golden labrador Jasper. We used to live on quite a busy road which was just opposite an alleyway that took you to the local recreation ground right next to a primary school. Jasper was a regular Houdini and my mum had many a phone call from the irate school caretaker telling her that the dog had got into the swimming pool again! (Yes, school used to have their own pools when I was young)!
  4. My exchange partner Gudrun. When I was 13 the school organised a German exchange trip, for two weeks we would be hosts to a German child and then we would go and stay with them for another two weeks. There were other schools taking part and we all had a fantastic laugh. I went again the next year with the school, and the year after, we did it on our own in the school holidays. Gudrun and her family were absolutely lovely and we stayed in touch for years afterwards.
  5. My record player. I had one of those little box type record players with the long spindle bit in the middle where you could stack a few records in a row (mind you, when you had about 4 on there and some of them were warped, they did not always play properly)! I have always loved music and my records were a huge part of my childhood.

So there are a few snippets from my childhood. Why not join in the challenge.

 

[Blog Event] The Great Book of Lists —

[Blog Event] The Great Book of Lists

I am going to have a go at this Challenge as it seems a lot of fun and could prove to be insightful too 🙂

Laduchessederat's avatarLa duchesse d'Erat

Dear Friends,

I invite you to live an experience for the forth coming year : build your own Great Book of Lists.

Lists reflect your happiness, your hopes, your project, your inclinations, the person you were, the person you long to become.

At the end of the year, 52 lists will offer a unique capture of your year. Compiled together, they’ll composer your Great Book of Lists, a gold mine of information in which you’ll be able to dig later on.

It will contain, I hope, humour, love, surprises, silliness – maybe – and many treasures for sure.

Each Monday, I’ll post a new theme and you’ll have until Sunday to publish you post, with the #TGBOL hashtag and a ping back  to the post of the week you participate

I’ll publish a round up on Monday.

The comments section is all yours to suggest themes for the forthcoming lists.

Don’t…

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Just Jot It January 5th – 2016 —

Just Jot It January 5th – 2016

We have an interesting prompt for Linda’s Just Jot it January today, ‘2016.’ I don’t tend to think too far ahead ass regards to planning out my year, being more the type of person who sees where life takes me.However, there are a few things that I would like to this year. I

However, there are a few things that I would like to this year. I already have the idea for a follow-on novel to the one I wrote for NaNoWriMo, and it would be wonderful if I could manage to write that, bearing in mind, there is still a lot of work left to do on the original one.

I have my 50th birthday coming up next month and still have no clue of how I am going to celebrate that. I aam not one of those dare-devil types that wants to bungee jump or skydive or something. In fact, being terrified of heights, I can think of nothing worse. I would actually like to survive whatever experience I undertake!

I know I need to take more care of my health this year, both physical and mental. I have to face up to the fact that I need to stay on my meds for depression, and not to cut it right down when I think I am feeling better! I also need to keep my blood sugars under control. It still actually hasn’t sunk in properly that I am diabetic, and I really do have to watch what I eat!

I always enjoy new challenges so will continue to join in with whatever bloggy ones take my fancy. I also love taking the little mini courses run by ‘Open University’ to broaden my knowledge. I have an unquenchable thirst for learning new things, and I want to learn a bit about photography so that I can use mostly my own pictures on my blog.

Whatever this year brings, one thing is for sure, you will probably end up reading about it on my blog!

 

Ronovan’s Writes Weekly Haiku Poetry Prompt # 78’Vast’ & ‘Clear’ — January 4, 2016

Ronovan’s Writes Weekly Haiku Poetry Prompt # 78’Vast’ & ‘Clear’

Ronovan has given us the words ‘vast’ and ‘clear’ for his first weekly haiku challenge of 2016.

Here is my attempt:

Kent Coast

 

Just Jot It January 4th – Dachshund —

Just Jot It January 4th – Dachshund

I have managed to stick with the prompts so far for Linda’s Just Jot It January challenge. Today’s however, is rather tricky as I do not have a dachshund, nor have I ever even met one!

Hmmm, I know, I will write a haiku about one!

Short legs, long body

Skilled in the art of hunting

Looks like a sausage!

Short-haired-Dachshund (1)
Iamge courtesy of Wikipedia
New Sensation — January 3, 2016

New Sensation

80's Photo

 

I came across the Daily Posts Prompt for today which was to write about fashions that you love, and from what era they come from.

I am sure most of you know by now that I love the 80’s! Now, I actually like the music from that era, but at the time, I embraced the whole lot. The clothes, and the hair styles, I even tried the make-up too, but I have never been skilled in that department, and the 80s makeup called for a lot of colour and a few hours to spare!!

The one thing I have always loved (and still do) is a bit of sparkle. If it has glitter and/or sequins then I am going to love it. At Christmas in particular, I would probably end up looking more garish than the Christmas tree fairy! As you can see from the photo, I was decked out in top to toe gold! The long, pleated skirt and best top were made of this kind of smooth, slippery material. My hair was the result of a failed ‘spiral perm’ that was popular in the day, and the colour seemed to match perfectly to my outfit!

I seem to remember wearing a lot of shiny dresses in the 80s of bright, vivid colours, banana yellow being a particular favourite. There was a lot of variety around at the time, as I also used to love my frilly shirts, jeans and pixie boots. The jeans had red piping down the side, and we used to have these canvas belts of all colours that we would wear too.

Of course, there were ‘ra-ra’ skirts too. although I did have one of these I was not too keen as they didn’t seem to flatter anyone, and certainly made me look pretty dumpy.

Although my school was pretty strict, especially with regards to uniform, I did manage to get away with wearing a pair of grey corduroy trousers that I I had taken in to make them even more of a ‘drainpipe’ style than they already were. Other than that I wore a pencil skirt, but me being me, got told off for ripping the split that was in the back of it even higher. (I never was ladylike,  always running up stairs two at a time, with no thought for the confines of the skirt! More sewing when the teachers noticed and I got told off.

Looking back, some of the fashions seem so ridiculous now, but at the time I was in my element!

 

Just Jot It January 3rd – Frozen —

Just Jot It January 3rd – Frozen

The following post is in response to Linda’s Just Jot It January. If you haven’t  already checked it out, please do so. It is a great way to get the blogging juices flowing!

One of the joys of a British winter is often waking up in the morning to a thick coating of frost everywhere. For many of us, this means  standing outside in the freezing cold with a scraper, scratching away with numb fingers. Poor Mr Grump, he did use to suffer out there  whilst I drank my tea, impatiently waiting for my car to be ready! Luckily this year has been much milder and we have only had the odd icy morning.

We took the decorations down on New Year’s Day, and Mr Grump was climbing up on furniture unpinning all the lights that were around the room. I meanwhile was undressing the poor old Christmas tree. I heard a loud ‘thud’ and a bit of swearing, and spun round wondering what had happened. Mr Grump was squatting on the chair clutching his head, frozen in pain. I however, was stuggling to control my lips from twitiching.

He is a bit of a drama  queen when he hurts himself, and was talking through clenched teeth, telling me he hit his head on the celing. I had already gathered this, but him crouching there statue-like, hands over his head was playing havoc with me trying to keep up a sympathetic wife face. I finally managed to prise his hands off his bald pate to see a pinhead sized piece of skin had been scraped off. How disappointing, I thought there might have at least been an egg sized lump after the fuss he made!

 

 

 

 

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