Rhyme and No Reason!

Blogger, author and rhymester who likes to find the humour in life.

Growing Old Disgracefully. — October 22, 2017

Growing Old Disgracefully.

I have been pretty negative about the process of aging recently, as you can see here and how I am starting to feel (not to mention look) old. I have decided that there must be some positives to being older, and here are a few things that I have noticed….

You can say what you ‘bloody well like’, in the words of my 85-year-old mother! Yes, once you reach a ripe old age you have earned the right to say what you like about anything; regardless of whether or not it causes offence or hurts anyone’s feelings. I have been in the supermarket with Mum when she has told the assistant on the deli counter that she ‘doesn’t want that plastic ham’ or she’s ‘not paying that much for a bit of cheese’ etc. They can’t decide whether or not she is joking but soon get the message when she turns on her heel and just stomps (well hobbles nowadays unfortunately) off! I. or my sisters (whoever has the pleasure of being with her)  are left cringing in her wake, rolling our eyes at the bewildered assistant.

She likes to say what she thinks about members of the family too. Either directly, once she told me that a trouser suit I had bought would look better on my sister as ‘she has got the figure for it’. Very true, but I was gutted, and never wore it again! Or indirectly, as in when someone has left the room and before they are even out of earshot she will remark about how much weight they have ‘piled on’ or how awful their outfit is!

Another advantage is selective hearing. This can come in very handy when you don’t want to do something. For example, my Mum hates putting her heating on, and would rather sit there shivering under a blanket than be nice and cosy in a warm room. So when any of us walk in to her little icebox, the conversation goes something like this.

“Why haven’t you got your heating on?”



“I cant’ hear a bloody word you are saying!”

Leaning over and bellowing in her ear,


” Can you put my hearing aid in, it’s over there?”

By now, I have lost the will to go on, but will dutifully get the hearing aid which is whistling and shrieking, and put it in for her, and then just go and turn the heating on myself. It’s easier.

However, if I had whispered to my sister a bit of gossip about someone, she would have heard that and put her two penn’orth in!

When you are older, and supposedly wiser, you are an asset to any quiz team! There are always questions about the old days. Games like Trivial Pursuit and other question based games normally require a good range of general knowledge, and of historical events.It stands to reason that n older person on the team is a bonus (providing they have their hearing aids in, of course)!

You can dress with abandon, wearing whatever you like in whatever colour combinations you choose when you are older. Who cares about being colour co-ordinated any more. Many elderly people I have encountered (which amounts to quite a few), are very  uninhibited in their dress sense. Why shouldn’t you wear reds, green and blues ALL at the same time! Who gives a toss about what others think?!!

You can nod off at the drop of a hat. Think Grandpa Simpson here, and his amazing ability to fall asleep, even mid-sentence! Yes, when you are older,nobody thinks it odd if you fall asleep at inappropriate times. How great is that? If you have a social function that you are obligated to go to but are not keen, it doesn’t matter! You can just have a snooze whenever you want and no-one will think you are rude. Far from it, they will probably think you are very sweet and endearing!

Those are just a few of the benefits I have come up with to being older…. are there any I have missed?

#WQWWC Writers Quote Wednesday Writing Challenge – MAGIC — March 23, 2016

#WQWWC Writers Quote Wednesday Writing Challenge – MAGIC

Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it.
Roald Dahl

This week for Colleen and Ron’s Writer’s Quote Wednesday challenge we have been given ‘magic’ as our prompt. I feel that there are many wondrous and magical things around us , if only we take the time to see it.

Magic is all around us

If only we choose to see.

The first cry of a baby

Delicious honey from a bee

The beauty of the countryside

In the flowers and the trees

The secret little kingdoms

That dwell beneath our seas

The sunrise and the sunset

Fluffy clouds that float on by

The aurora borealis-

That lightshow in the sky

The scientific breakthroughs

That helps us cure our sick

Magicians that keeps us guessing

At how they do their tricks

The glistening snowy landscape

Sparkling stars at night

Yes, magic is all around us

It makes our world so bright.

TJ’s Household Haiku Challenge – Bucket. — January 30, 2016

TJ’s Household Haiku Challenge – Bucket.


Buckets of Flowers

This week we have been given ‘bucket’ by TJ for his household challenge.  The only bucket I have at home is the bog standard mop bucket we all have kicking around! Not very exciting.

I then realised that I had made the ‘bucket’ bag not that long ago to keep my knitting in, but that had already starred in a haiku of its own, so it is time to think of something else.

We had to nip out this afternoon to get some bits from the supermarket, and look what we saw….yes buckets of flowers! Ok, they aren’t technically my household object, but I am going for poetic licence on this one!

Beautiful flowers:

Fresh, vibrant colours displayed

in dull, black buckets.



Ronovan’s Writes Weekly Haiku Poetry Prompt Challenge #71 ‘Cover’ and ‘Colour.’ — November 16, 2015
TJ’s Household Haiku Challenge – Garden — October 25, 2015

TJ’s Household Haiku Challenge – Garden

TJ has given us ‘garden’ for this week’s Household Haiku Challenge, which you really must check out. His own haiku this week is brilliant!

Seeing as it is now well into autumn over here in England, my garden is looking a bit neglected, and there is not much to see. However, there is a little bit of colour, and I have played with the photo a bit trying to bring it to the forefront. (I am a total amateur at photography as you know, but am pleased with it)!

Anyway, on to the Haiku:

Untroubled by rain,

cosy in their purple capes

sweet peas hang in there!

I have taken TJ’s advice and am linking it to the Daily Post’s ‘Careful’ photo challenge.

What I see in a Tree — September 23, 2015

What I see in a Tree

Majestically it stands there

Surveying all it sees

The winter branches barren

Devoid of lush green leaves.


Yet life is still within it

Just waiting for the spring

When its buds start blooming

And the birds begin to sing


In summer comes its glory

When it wears a party dress

Of several different colours

Its beauty outshines the rest


Then autumn comes a-calling

And it starts a slow striptease

The leaves are changing colour

And are dropping in the breeze


This is the work of nature

Of death and then re-birth

The barren and the beautiful

The treasures from the earth.

This is a poem I wrote some time ago, that I thought would fit the bill perfectly for my understanding of a vignette, the task for today’s Writing 101 course.

New Season’s Colours — September 2, 2015
Episode 418: The Delights of Decorating! — July 16, 2015

Episode 418: The Delights of Decorating!

Tomorrow Miss Hap breaks up for the summer holidays until early September! This is always a nightmare as far as childcare is concerned as myself and Mr Grump usually take a couple of alternate weeks off each, and for the others I work a couple of nights and a day over the weekend. We are lucky that we can do this, and Mr Grump has got the first week off next week.

Miss Hap has decided that she wants to totally redecorate her room as she has grown tired of it! We only did it a couple of years ago in the orange and lime green that she wanted. (It sounds a bit loud but I really like it actually, although I was a bit reluctant at first)! As her room was the last one to be done it was not next on my list at all, but as she had worked so hard at school lately despite a very rocky start, and won an award on Monday for German and Music I am considering it. I also have an ulterior motive in that her room is a mess, and I told her if she cleaned it out spotlessly I might think about it.

Now she has already been giving her orders about colour schemes and what she wants to do. In fact, bless her, she cut a load of letters out to stick on her wall already as you can see in the pic. Now I hate decorating (well the mess that goes with it), and get very stressed with furniture all over the place and other stuff strewn about, so I have decided that this part of the deal will go to Mr Grump!

He likes painting and decorating, and if he doesn’t get it done next week (along with some other chores I have given him to do), then he is off  the first week in August and can do it then. It’s a shame really, because I have got to work and he will have to do it all by himself (no doubt a lot of direction from Miss Hap too)!!


Episode 410: A Colourful Life. — July 9, 2015

Episode 410: A Colourful Life.

As I am sure many of you know, the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge had their daughter Princess Charlotte christened over the weekend. Today has seen the release of the official photographs, which I just happened upon as I was reading the online newspaper.

What made me laugh is the newspaper had some ‘etiquette expert’ analyse it, and he came to the conclusion that the Middletons (Catherine’s family),are very ‘middle class!’ This is due to them mostly choosing beige as the colour of their outfits, which is neutral and therefore not offensive to anybody! Likewise the walls of the room the photo was taken were also beige. As this was the Queen’s private residence in Norfolk, I bet she would also rank as middle-classed.

God knows how a colour can define your social standing, but I can only imagine how low in the pecking order I would be as I love colour! Especially as it is the summer time. Yellow is my favourite colour, but I love orange and red, gold and silver, lime green, mint green, anything that is bright and cheerful.

Think of all the beautiful flowers and their vibrant colours, I don’t know about you but looking at them really lifts my mood. I understand that loud, garish colours are not always appropriate, but neither is bland old beige!

Episode 355. Ronovans Writes Weekly Haiku Poetry Prompt #47: Water & Bard. — June 1, 2015

Episode 355. Ronovans Writes Weekly Haiku Poetry Prompt #47: Water & Bard.

Oh I do love Mondays when I can get to have a go at Ronovan’s  weekly Haiku Challenge. He has, however, given us some really tricky words to use this week, with ‘bard’ and ‘water.’ I do love a challenge though and have had a go.

Nature’s bright colours:

A trickling waterfall hides

– Bard’s inspiration.

Beautiful Waterfall

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