For today’s Tidbit post, I have decided to forego writing a poem as I have done for the previous couple of Tuesdays, and have decided to go for a bit of humour instead. (This heatwave is already far too hot for me to be adding it, by writing anything too raunchy)!
What I thought I would do is write a few of the popular euphemisms for sex that we use. be they coy or coarse, just for a bit of fun!
Rumpy-pumpy, and hanky-panky. – They sound so childish but I do love a rhyme.
Having a bit of ‘how’s your father’ – Very Carry On!
Slap and tickle – This sounds a little on the 50 Shades spectrum if you ask me!
Assault with a friendly weapon – God, how cringeworthy!
Bonking or humping – these just make me laugh.
Shagging – Yeah Baby! Very Austin Powers.
Making looooove – That always seems a bit smarmy to me, and a bit too smooth, very Mills and Boon! (I am more of a Jilly Cooper/Jackie Collins type of girl myself)!!!
Rogering – Very British!
Shafting or screwing – these sound too painful, as well as a bit DIY!
Dipping the wick – Sounds gross!
Which one is your favourite, or is it something totally different?

We say sexing. Doing the sex. Shagging’s not bad, bonking is funny. I suppose we don’t talk about it much, what with all the hanky panky, who has time? 😛
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ooooh get you! Some of us are not so lucky hence the reason why we talk about it all the time! 😁
LikeLiked by 2 people
What about nookey you left that one out,
or making the beast with two backs,
the one thing clearly you made me recall,
is sex, being just what my sex life lacks.
xxx Massive Hugs xxx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha ha how could I forget nookey?! Oh dear well I hope this brought back some pleasant memories! Xx
LikeLiked by 1 person
Love em Judy!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thought you might! Thanks Ritu 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
😊
LikeLike
One from university days and rather American is pummelling the beaver, poor critter. Rogering in reminds me of the apocryphal names of the crew in Captain Pugwash – Master Bates, Seaman Staines and Roger the Cabin Boy.
LikeLiked by 2 people
‘Pummelling the beaver’ sounds quite funny. I never knew the names of the Captain Pugwash crew, Hilarious!
LikeLiked by 1 person
http://www.snopes.com/radiotv/tv/pugwash.asp
LikeLiked by 1 person
Interesting article but I think that the smutty names are much better! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Now why am I not surprised you said that!?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha Ha! you have got the measure of me already! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hahaaaaa nice one Judy. How about Banging
Maybe another Diy related one☺
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, I forgot that one! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Need a hammer for that though lol.☺
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha Ha! You nutter! A large tool will do! 🙂
LikeLiked by 2 people
Hahaaaaa now now Judy I’m a good boy me. Honest😜
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes of course you are Rich!!!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
LikeLiked by 1 person
And fornication sounds prickly☺
LikeLiked by 2 people
Oh yes, far too clinical!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Nookey was always one of the nicer ones, but then there’s blanket bingo too.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha Ha! Never heard of that one before but I like it! 😉
LikeLike
A bit of “how’s your father” cracks me up. That’s a new one for me. Funny list. ☺
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Van, 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh it has to be the rhymes, always!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, I love a bit of rumpy-pumpy! 🙂
LikeLike
Shagging, of course! Lol
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yeah Baby, of course! 🙂
LikeLike
Great list, Judy!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Tonya. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Nice list, Judy. I’ve never heard the “how’s your father ” one…any sexual expression that uses the words mother or father is not for me.
Screwing and DIY; that’s good 🙂 never thought of it like that. Never liked the expression, seems too impersonal.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I know what you mean, as I said to Linda, I like a bit of shagging or rumpy-pumpy! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hi Edwina! Ha, ha! This is great! You had me cracking-up with ‘bonking’ and ‘shagging’. Most of these make me cringe. How about, ‘lets get it on’ or ‘lets do it. Personally, I like ‘lets have sex’. 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Bonking makes me laugh too, and I like shagging! . Let’s have sex is ok too 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
How about “doing the horizontal tango” or “shaking of the sheets”?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oooh. I haven’t heard of either but I like the ‘shaking of the sheets’ one best! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ahhh I’ve never heard rumpy-pumpy, but that’s my new favorite!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Brilliant isn’t it?! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
You have a good spread there, Edwina, sounds like you’ve tried them all
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha Ha! Well………..
LikeLiked by 1 person
0 Pingbacks
Translate
This is me!
Judy E Martin
Hello, and thanks for stopping by. I am Judy, in my (very) early fifties and decided that life definitely gets more interesting as it goes on! I am a wife and a mum and have just finished University as a Registered Nurse, after having worked as an Associate Practitioner in the NHS. I am also a poet and the author of my debut book, 'Rhymes of the Times.' I love to laugh, and I love rhyming words too, so I joined the two together, and my book was born. I am currently working on another book in the series also. I am a prolific blogger and enjoy writing funny stories, anecdotes, and anything really that takes my fancy.
View Full Profile →
Top Posts & Pages
Blogs I Follow
Thanks for visiting
Lates Blog Posts
RSS
Having fun blogging with friends
Lifestyle blog featuring the fabulous North East and beyond
Sharing my thoughts, poems, travel & art
Apps for any screen
Just your average PhD student using the internet to enhance their CV
Life in words
Exploring writing and the creative randomness of life. Snapshots of moments.
Aakashsoyanthone
...with a twist.
by Sam Allen
The jumbled musings of Tallis Steelyard
Diary of a Dublin Housewife
Visual Alchemy & Artifacts of Remembrance
Rants, humor, sarcasm, and a haiku-like substance? It's hard to know what's going to come out of our minds next.
Promoting a Healthy Mind, Body and Spirit
Photography, Birds and Travel
An onion has many layers. So have I!
Rants, Ramblings, and Regrets
A family from Michigan living abroad in Germany.